Cat Haiku

Small, brave carnivores
Kill pine cones and mosquitoes
Fear vacuum cleaner.

I want to be close
to you. Can I fit my head
inside your armpit?

You never feed me.
Perhaps I'll sleep on your face.
That will sure show you.

The rule for today:
Touch my tail, I shred your hand.
New rule tomorrow.

You must scratch me there!
Yes, above my tail! Behold -
Elevator butt!

My small cardboard box.
You cannot see me if I
can just hide my head.

Want to go outside.
Oh no! Help! I got outside!
Let me back inside!

The Big Ones snore now.
Every room is dark and cold.
Time for cup hockey!

In deep sleep hear sound
cat vomit hairball somewhere
will find in morning.

Grace personified.
I leap into the window.
I meant to do that.

Blur of motion & sound, then --
silence, me, a paper bag.
What is so funny?

The mighty hunter
Returns with gifts of plump birds --
your foot just squashed one.

You're always typing.
Well, let's see you ignore me
sitting on your hands.

Oh no! Big One
has been trapped by newspaper!
Cat to the rescue!

Humans are so strange.
Mine lies still in bed, then screams.
My claws are not that sharp.


Dog Haiku

I am your best friend.
Now, always, especially
when you are eating.

I sound the alarm!
Mailman come to kill us all!
Look! Look! Look! Look! Look!