*sigh* I know I have the potential to become and alcoholic, as it runs heavily in my family, and when I do drink I can easily see myself getting out of control with it.

So I'm cautious, and I use my dad as an example of what I never want to be. I grew up under his fists and he provided me with great motivation to control myself, but it's not easy.

My dad claims he's doing better now, and for a few months, I really believed him. He was going to AA, not drinking, taking antidepressants, and acting like a decent human being....all this after my mom finally threw him out of the house. Now he's drinking "just wine" again, which interferes with the antidepressants and turns him back into the same aggressive person I grew up with. My mom claims she won't let it get as bad as before, she'll throw him out again, but I don't see it happening, and it makes me sad.

Dad has been trying to reconcile things with me for the last few months, and on a few occasions I've come close to forgiving him some of what he's done....but he's starting to do it all over again, so for now, I give up.