A Letter from an Alcoholic

[Medusa]

"You alone can do it - but you don't have to do it alone."

I love this line. It can apply to anything in life, not just addiction. Who said this, Candace, or is it one of your pearls? It's so true.

[Catty1]

Mary, I just that somewhere in the past halls of the 12-Step programs. I'm sure it didn't originate there!

D&D - My understanding - only mine - of the "I hate myself, but love you" statement is something like "I hate what I am doing, I hate how I am screwing everything up...I am still the same person inside that loved you, and still loves you."

BTW - I long ago changed my mind on the "You can't love anyone til you love yourself" - I beat myself up over that one.

I heard someone disagree with that one day, and I asked them to explain it more. His belief: "OK, the book says the Great Reality [God] is deep down within each of us, right? " "Right." "And God is love. So we already have all the love we need deep down within us."

Most active addicts have zero self-esteem. There is one young man here in town that we are all waiting to drop dead. He will. He lost family and everything, and now that he knows he can't get that back, he has become resigned, and keeps on drinking. He looks horrible.
He is corked when he comes to meetings.

I hope he turns around...but right now, "He alone can do it..."

[moosmom]

Boy did this come at an awkward time. Yesterday would've been my Dad's 81st birthday. He was an alcoholic and I was his enabler. Why? I bought him his booze to avoid him getting into his truck and driving to the liquor store possibly killing himself or someone else. Years of guilt followed me. I haven't cried all weekend (my mom's anniversary was Friday) and this thread has brought on the water works. Crying is supposed to be very cleansing, so I guess I needed it.

I am also a recovering alcoholic. And the letter is correct, arguing and fighting over it does nothing. It takes hitting rock bottom before an alcoholic will admit his problem and get help. Unfortunately, my father hit rock bottom years ago and it was HIS choice to stay there till he "cruised on outta here".

[shepgirl]

Have alcoholics in the family and some friends also. Our AA meetings are open to everyone...but they do warn us not to make the alcoholic's problem ours. Seems they have to hit rock bottom before they face that fact and do something about it. However, there is someone in our town who has hit rock bottom ages ago and keeps on drinking, I think only death will stop him, a real shame.

Catty1 - the media is now trying to classify drug addiction as a medical disease....We learned that drinking and doing drugs is a choice someone makes. My cousin is a prime example...he drinks one beer, one drink, and he knows he won't stop there, he will drink himself into a stupor. His choice was to abstain from ever touching a drink, and he's doing marvellous.

[Catty1]

shepgirl - if you want to argue with the Canadian and American medical and Psychiatric Associations on addiction as a disease, feel free.

Go back to the Big Book and read "The Doctor's Opinion".

And at the next meeting, maybe ask "How do you know it's a disease?" Then take the cotton out of your ears, put it in your mouth, and LISTEN.