Sorry so many jokes today, but I just ran into a bunch of good ones!
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Beth was attending her High School reunion and was
having a blast. As the evening was drawing to a close,
the master of ceremonies for the night proceeded to
hand out bottles of champagne to the graduates who
had traveled the farthest distance to attend the reunion,
the graduate who had been married the longest time,
the graduate who had become the most successful, etc.

As Beth was wondering if she was going to get a prize
the master of ceremonies called out her name. "Beth,
you win with 11 kids," and then trying to be clever, he
added, "and champagne is only half the prize. The other
half is a giant, economy size bottle of aspirin."

"Don't bother with the aspirin," Beth replied. "It's obvious
with this many kids that I've never had a headache."

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A couple of nuns who were nursing sisters had
gone out to the country to minister to an
outpatient. On the way back they were a few
miles from home when they ran out of gas. They
were standing beside their car on the shoulder
when a truck approached.

Seeing ladies of the cloth in distress, the driver
stopped to offer his help. The nuns explained they
needed some gas. The driver of the truck said he
would gladly drain some from his tank, but he didnt
have a bucket or can.

One of the nuns dug out a clean bedpan and asked
the driver if he could use it. He said yes, and
proceeded to drain a couple of quarts of gas into
the pan. He waved goodbye to the nuns and left.
The nuns were carefully pouring the precious fluid
into their gas tank when the highway patrol came by.

The trooper stopped and watched for a minute,
then he said: "Sisters, I don't think it will work, but
I sure do admire your faith!"