Dear self,
Pleeeeeease stop. Breathe, calm down, relax.

You need to stopppp having panic attacks.
Okay, so you thought you saw Jay today... but you didn't. You had a panic attack anyway.

You don't live a normal life anymore. Every time you see someone that looks like him, your heart immediately goes into overdrive and you panic. You see a car that looks like his, a dog that looks like his... this needs to stop. You need to start living again... not living in fear.

You don't go a day without this fear. You don't WANT to see him. You WANTED him to rot in prison, but he's not, so you now live your life walking on eggshells.

Maybe. Maybe someday it will go away.

Wishfully,
You