Fire extinguishers! At the run up to the vault in gymnastics.

Swimming?

Use goggles that black out the swimmer's view. Who ever gets to the end of the pool without crashing, wins!

Barb wire pole vaulting and high jumping!

The decathalon events while texting on a PDA.

Team volleyball with two balls at a time.

Team discus, like regular frisbee! Catch and throw!

Long Jump? More pirahnas!

Switch the balls between table tennis and tennis.

Team handball with a shot put!

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What is it with the close up shots of people that screw up in their event?

Hows about Mexican wrestling masks, so they don't have to go home where everyone knows what they look like!

No more interviews with the winner's family members! We always hear how wonderful they are. Talk to some of the other participants....more intriguing storylines. Phelps got to eat, sleep and swim to get to China. He said the has a new home and multiple cars. Now, I know he trained hard to get their but who paid for his 12,000 calorie meals, lodging and expenses.

Here in Cah Lee fuh Nee ah if you eat, sleep and swim every day, You live with mom, are unemployed and have a pool. We are not Olympians, we are slackers, lazy or incredibly rich.

What about the guy who had to train on donkeys in Uruguay to prepare for the dressage? (Not a true story. Just looking for that human interest spin.)