My mom is pretty sick.

[Barbara]

Richard I think what Phred said about the "Medical Power of Attorney" is very true. We had my mom sign one when she became so ill and we were very happy to have it later.
Plus: unfortunately it is normal that you experience the most conflict with your closest relatives when something like that happens. Try to play it as cool as possible. Don't waste energy on it- you'll need it for you and your mom.

[chocolatepuppy]

I'm sorry to hear about your mom Richard. My prayers go out to both of you.

[Ginger's Mom]

I am so sorry to hear that your mother and you are going through so much. More prayers are going out for both of you.

[Randi]

Richard, I'm so sorry to hear your mom is ill. I hope the treatment she gets will make her better! Parents can be so stubborn when it comes to going to hospital - I know first hand! Four days before John and I came back from a holiday in Spain, her doctor had told her she needed a blood transfusion, but she refused to get it before I was back.

Over that period, my sister wasn't much help, so I know there's a lot to deal with for you. I do hope you can count on your sister!

I don't know what Medical Power of Attorney is, but it's probably a good idea to get it signed.

I'm sending lots of positive thoughts to your mom - and to you. Hang in there, and do what you can!

(((hugs))) .... and headbumpies from Fister.

[robinh]

You and your mom are in my thoughts and prayers. Enjoy this time, you'll remember how close you become...later.

I did this back in 2001 with my dad. No matter how you think you've prepared, everything that hits you during this time is all such a shock. Just dealing with the mountains of paperwork is frightening.

[Laura's Babies]

Your Mother sounds exactly like mine was. NO doctors and just forget hospitals and actually, I think she lived longer because of it. If she ever took medicine they gave her to take, she would only take half of what she was suppose to take. Again, I think she was healthier and lived longer because of it!

When Mama was diagnosed with cancer, she flat refused any kind of treatment for it. She was 80 years old and said she would not survive surgery and she knew it. She also refused any treatment. We agreed with her although the doctors wanted us to have her declared incompetent and make her have the surgery. To us it was QUALITY verses quanity and what kind of quality would she have has cut all up in her already fragile shape... she just would not have survived the surgery, she was far to frail.. They told us she would only live a year but they didn't know her! She lived 17 more months and was up and around every single day, including the day she died.

This may sound terriably odd Richard, but some of our best times were while she was dying. I discussed things openly and frankly with her often about her condition, I held nothing back. I even told her when we went and made her "arrangements" and what they were and she was very pleased with what we arranged for her saying she has a great life and was ready to move on. We joked and laughed, kidded each other every day. I cleaned up her messy butt many times and LOVED doing it. To bathe her, I would get in the shower with her and we were like a couple of kids together in the shower, it was SO MUCH FUN! Those are priceless, treasured moments we shared and I do not regret one second of them. We were closer then than ever and created more than a lifetime of memories in those 17 months. I treasure every one of them.

[Bengalz]

Richard,

I am so sorry to hear about your Mom and understand very well the situation you are in and the emotions you feel. My own mother has Alzheimers and both my husband's parents' days are numbered (Parkinsons and simply old age).

It is an inevitable world we live in and when the time comes for our parents it is so tough. We second guess ourselves and feel emotions we didn't know existed.

Some very good advice I've been given is to spend as much quality time with your Mom while you can. It is heart-wrenching but very necessary - for her and for you. Don't forget to tell her you love her - that's all that really matters

Take care of yourself and know there are many here who care.

Hugs, Betty

[joycenalex]

richard, i am so sorry to read about your moms' illness. our moms walk so heavy in our lives, that their footfalls echo for years. would your mom like some snail mail cards to open? hugs and hopes for good days, joyce

[Daisy and Delilah]

{quote}The last year has been a real test of who I am. It's been tough, but what doesn't kill you, makes you think you can live forever....I think!?!{end quote}

I know what you mean, Richard. This profound statement you made really hits close to home for me.

I just wanted to send more thoughts and prayers out to you. I'm sorry you're all having to go through this. Your Mom sounds like a great gal. {{{{{RICHARD, MOM, AND, FAMILY}}}}}