I REALLY THINK ALLOWING THE CATS TO WORK IT OUT THEIR OWN WAY IS BEST. I WAS ALSO VERY AFRAID WHEN IN AROUND 2006 I WENT TO A LOCAL ANIMAL PROTECTIVE PLACE AND FELL IN LOVE WITH A BEAUTIFUL BLACK AND WHITE MALE TUXEDO SAMMY. I ADOPYED HIM AND BROUGHT HIM HOME TO SLOWLY MEET PEPPER-A FEMALE SOMESTIC SHORTHAIR WHO IS A TOTAL PRINCESS/DIVA. IT HAD BEEN HER AND I ALONE FOR SOME TIME AFTER A PREVIOUS CAT PASSED AWAY IN 2005. PEPPER AND I MOVED TO A VERY NICE APARTMENT WHERE IT CONTINUED TO BE JUST US LADIES. WELL-WHEN PEPPER REALIZED SAMMY WAS STAYING SHE REALLY WAS AFRAID AND JEALOUS AND GROWLING BECAME COMMONPLACE WHERE SHE NEVER DID BEFORE. GROWLING AT ME AND HISSING AT SAMMY. SAMMY IS HALF THE AGE PEPPER IS. THEY ARE BOTH SPAYED/NEUTERED . GRADUALLY THIN GS HAVE CALMED DOWN AND NOW THEY CAN ACTUALLY BE SEEN ON THE BED TOGETHER-BUT A FEW FEET AWAY MIND YOU! PEPPER HISSES FOR A SECOND OR TWO WHEN SAMMY WALKS UP TP HER BUT HE RUNS AWAY AND DOESN'T SEEM PHASED! I TELL BOTH OF THEM I LOVE THEM AND NEED THEM. I JUST GOT A COMPUTER FOR THE FIRST TIME THIS PAST YEAR AND PEPPER SITS OVER BEHIND WHERE THE FAN BLOWS. SAMMY IS GENERALLY ON THE BED. HE AND I LOVE THE MEERKAT MANOR DVDS I HAVE. PEPPER WILL RUN IN AND JOIN ME ON THE BED-PURRING LIKE CRAZY. THE MOMENT SHE HEARS SAMMY SHE DIVES OFF AND HISSES A BIT THEN IS GONE. i HAVE ALWAYS FED THEM IN SEPARATE BEDROOMS WITH 2 LITTERBOXES. WE ARE DOING FINE. JUST GIVE LOVE AND RESPECT AS WELL AS SPACE TO THEM-GGOD LUCK..SUSANSWATLIN518