Lut, I used to go through this with Rascal. He was a feral cat so he loved the outdoors. But he also just loves a good fight and he came home once too many times chewed up.

It took some doing - but he now understands that he is an indoor cat.
It is a shame because Annie and Emma were always good and stayed in the yard. But it didn't seem fair to let them go out and not Rascal.

He complained and howled and bolted towards an open door or would sneak into the basement if given the chance - and yes, it is hard to listen to all of that yowling and complaining.

If I were you, I think I would try the harness and leash idea as soon as possible. She may not like it - but you are doing it for HER GOOD.
You can't continue to go through this worry.

I know that Sara (Edwina's Secy) has been very successful with the harness and leash system with Edwina and Eddie.

It gets down to - what is the best for your kitty - and who is in charge?

It would help if Jo could tame down his playing rough too - she may be frightened by his rough play.