Get Well Wishes for Robin (RobiLee)

[ramanth]

Lovely photos Robin!! Sorry the race got rained out, but it looks like you had a nice day.

[wolf_Q]

Thanks for sharing the pics, Robin! Everyone looks great and very happy. Its great to see Sammi and Stella again too! I'm glad you had a nice time!

[beeniesmom]

Those pictures made me smile. You look really good.

[RobiLee]

I hate to bump this up but I was just feeling the need for that loving PT support. Need your postive vibes, need some humor and smiles.

I received my restraining order and divorce papers from Alden yesterday. Anna came to visit yesterday and I had just got the papers before she got here so I did start to read them with her but they were making me angry so I just set them aside. I should have kept reading them while she was here because I wound up getting very angry, feeling a rage come on and crying when I finally remembered I had the papers and sat down to read them last night.

They had me so upset. I know the restraining order is common practice during a divorce but it still upset me a little bit. What really got to me was the divorce papers. I was so mad and upset. I feel like it is just a bunch of lies and what little truth is in there is a completely twisted version of what he believes to be true in his head. I was just so enraged, so upset and crying like crazy. I don't like getting that way. Of course I called my parents and sobbed and yelled at them. I really really need to quit calling them. I was so upset that I woke up this morning not even remembering going to bed. I left Tori out all night and left candles burning. This is not me. I never leave candles burning and never leave my dogs out over night. I was so confused when I woke up. I don't like this feeling. It has all reminded me that this is such a long slow process and I'm so afraid of it getting the better of me. I hate all the nastiness. All the lies. I just want it over with. Why couldn't we just get a dissolution? Why did he have to turn things into something nasty? Why couldn't he just tell me the truth about that stupid woman, maybe I could have coped better if he would have just told the truth. I wish everyone knew what a huge pathetic liar he is.

I need your help, your humor and your strength.

I NEED TO SLAY THIS DRAGON!!!!

Thanks for being here and listening.

Love, Robin

[Rachel]

Although I've never gone through a divorce, I have had friends who have. For some unknown reason, when some of these men *want out*, it seems that it isn't enough to just want out, but they have a need to make it the other person's fault. Just try to realize it isn't about you, it's his problem. I know the shock, hurt, and anger you are experiencing because this is coming from your life's partner are very normal. But you have to keep your focus on your own health and well being. You have to not let your feelings spiral out of control to your own detriment as that is only making his allegations more believable. Talk your feelings out with family, friends and therapist. You are on the road to a new life and nothing he can do or say can deter you from your pursuit of happiness. Don't give him that power.

[anna_66]

Oh Robin, I wish you would have read them while I was there. I'm sorry they got you so upset, but I totally understand after hearing just a little of what he was saying.

Like we were saying yesterday, just forget that slime bag and get on with your life. You can do whatever you want, whenever you want. Have fun and don't let this get you down as much as it did. Your so much better than him so don't let his lies get you so enraged. You know the truth.

(((HUGS)))
I hope you awake because I'm calling!

[Cinder & Smoke]

I left Tori out all night and left candles burning.

Doesn't Tori know how to Ring the Doorbell?
Best you should start those lessons!

I have misplaced a dog or two when I thought both or all three had come in together
when, in fact, one was "late showing up" and missed the door.
* Cinder *paws* the door - LOUDLY - and will *whine*, then *BARK*!
* Smokey *paces* on the porch and tries to *jingle* his tags
* Bowser either shouldered the door or just curled up on the rug and *waited* to be missed.
. . . Sure do *miss* him now!

* And whoever is inside usually starts to look/act *worried*; if I've fallen asleep -
I'll get a *nose punch* or an arm tossed - a "hint" that something's amiss.

As for the Burning and Forgotten candles ...
* Get an egg timer - set it to *ring* every 3-5 minutes when you're burning a candle.
* Lay a hot pan pad down, then a Pyrex flat-bottomed bowl or oven dish, THEN the candle
INside the bowl or dish ... and still Stay Awake!

Keep *smiling*

[Pawsitive Thinking]

Hey you xxx

What matters here is that you know the truth - whatever he thinks his version is - and the end result is that you will be shot of him for good.

Do what has to be done with the papers then file them away - no torturing yourself by keep reading them over and over again - is he worth the energy you waste getting upset?? NO! You could put that to much better use...

Don't feel bad about calling your parents - that is what they are for and no matter what age you are, you are still their "baby". They will be there for you - as will we

Now, go hug a dog or two or three

[RobiLee]

Thanks everyone. After talking to Anna on the phone and now coming here and reading this I am feeling much much better. Thanks again for the support and helping me to keep my head on straight

{{{BIG HUGS}}}

[Pam]

LOVE THE PICTURES!

Don't feel bad about calling your parents - that is what they are for and no matter what age you are, you are still their "baby". They will be there for you - as will we

Couldn't have said it better!

Robin when I am facing something coming up in my life that I am dreading I try to look past it. What I mean is that, say, something is going to happen on Monday, I say to myself...."Self, by Tuesday you will be doing thus and so." It is a little game that I play with myself which takes the focus off the future and puts it into the past even though it hasn't happened yet. How's that for confusing? Try to get a glimpse of your future, (after the divorce), and that includes a whole new life for you! Focus on that! Some day you will look back on all of this and there will be no pain, no hurt and no anger because it will all be a distant memory and you will be in such a better place. You WILL get there!

Regarding leaving Tori out, I have a confession to make too. Years ago when my dad was in the hospital my brother and I would ride down weekly to visit him. One day my brother came to pick me up and I forget to let the dogs (two toy poodles) back in. Thank God my next door neighbor noticed them and took them into her home that day because it went up to about 90 and there was no water outside and I was gone for hours! Every time I think of that, and it happened decades ago, I cringe!! We are human. Thankfully Tori is no worse for it.

[Ginger's Mom]

Great post Pam, and I like your little "game." I think I may try that some time when I have a seemingly overwhelming event looming. You may want to give it a try, Robin. More hugs coming your way.

[cyber-sibes]

I NEED TO SLAY THIS DRAGON!!!!

Robin, I made this for you & am sending it as a card, too, but after reading how upset you are, I thought it might be good to post it now here - hang in there, girl!

[RobiLee]

Robin, I made this for you & am sending it as a card, too, but after reading how upset you are, I thought it might be good to post it now here - hang in there, girl!

All I can say is WOW!! I'm touched and teary eyed. {{{{{{HUGS}}}}}

[RobiLee]

Pam, I like the idea of your game also. I will keep this in mind. Joyce, again thank you so much.

Like I told Joyce in a PM this thread has become a part of my therapy. Thank you all so much!!!

Much love coming out to you all!

Robin

[Rachel]

Oh, I love this! It speaks volumes.