Donna---you are talking about depression only. If you have a simple depression caused by a chemical imbalance then the Tegretol is not the drug for you. It's main use is for manic depression and bipolar and you didn't mention these so I assumed that you didn't have those problems. I was taking Tegretol for trigeminal pain on one side of my head and face, they helped tremendously but because they made me so depressed I had to quit them.
I know where you are coming from, my daughter suffers depression and is taking celexa, she gets like this every winter and I see what it does to her...those pills are not to be stopped abruptly either, she gets weaned off over a period of one month. She wants to try and get through next winter without the pills but I don't know iof she will be able to, but time will tell.
In the meantime, loving your furfriends and keeping them close to you is a good remedy as is going for walks, shopping or visiting friends.
I'm sorry you are going through this but I feel you should go back on the celexa and talk to your doctor about some kind of financial aid. The right drug is very important in treating depresion.
As for the "great guy" you thought you had, better to find out he's not sogreat before wasting more time on him...in my eyes he wasn't for you if he ran at the first sign of trouble.