Dear matt,

So you said we'd be friends, you said we were cool and you didn't want to do anything to hurt me. So..... why are you doing this to me now? It's completely ridiculous that you're ignoring me! Guess what I can move on, I'm not obsessed with you, and yes I still want to be your friend. But if you're going to be ridiculous about this then whatev. There are other guys out there and I can find someone else. So bite me.

Your friend, Megan