Help us old folks understand....

[moosmom]

As my father always told me, "You'll understand why I do the things I do for you when you have children of your own." By God he was right!! And I told him so and gave him a big hug. His response, "I know!!" with a smirk on his face.

I feel your pain, Kim. I only wish kids would come with an instruction manual and a money back guarantee.

[sparks19]

Well... I never went out and drank behind my parents back... mostly because my parents never made it "taboo". I was allowed to have a drink... maybe even two during holidays like Christmas or new years or whatever when I was in my early teens... always at home and only if I wasn't going anywhere after. I know that is a hot button topic but I NEVER felt the need to go out and sneak around and get loaded behind my parents back because they didn't make it a totally taboo issue.

As for the meeting someone over the internet..... I met my husband over the internet actually...of course I was also 23 years old at the time lol. I was safe about our meeting. Everyone knew where I was going to be... I had a friend with me... and I even had his dog tags from the army so I had ALL of his info including his SS#. Turns out he was a WONDERFUL man. I remember my grandfather calling me when I was going to move to the States to be with him and he was very concerned and my dad actually got on the phone and told him to stop worrying because he had met him and he was a great guy. While I definitely appreciate my grandfathers concern.... he just didn't have a chance to meet him and now that my grandparents know him... they love him.

of course my parents were a little concerned that I was meeting a guy from the internet... but I was 23 and they couldn't really do anything to stop me.... so they tried to at least be somewhat supportive so that I wouldn't just cut them out of the loop. Now they see what a great man he is and that it really wasn't a mistake. Honestly, is meeting a man over the internet any worse than meeting a man at the bar that you hardly know? (I know that is how many girls meet a guy and they are usually scum) Girls (and guys) just need to realize that they need to be more responsible with these meetings.

ETA: My mom and I definitely had our issues when I was younger.... and YES now that I have a child of my own I really truly appreciate her. Although we have gotten along wonderfully for many years now I have a totaly different respect for her now. I speak to her everyday and other than my husband she is my very best friend. I regret the years I caused her grief. I love her so very much and appreciate everything she did for me... I wish I had always shown her that respect.

[mruffruff]

Unfortunately, no matter what a parent does or says, it has a 50/50 chance of sinking in. Some kids just have to have extreme repercussions before they "get it".

My daughter still hasn't---and she just turned 43. She drinks daily, chooses not to keep a job long, can't keep the bills paid and if she wants something, she buys it. Her house is always a mess because she's so disorganized. Not a good role model for her 12 year old daughter.

She's smart enough to know what she should do, but emotionally still a rebellious teen. All my talks and hints and trying to be a good example are a waste of time and energy.

All we can do is to provide them with the information and tools. Then step back and hold our breath.