I hope my plans happen....

**Freedom** · 12-02-2007, 12:25 PM

I've been thinking of you and praying for the situation with your mom. Thanks for posting a bit of an update on that. I didn't now the employment was also an issue. Goodness, you really will enjoy Springtime this year, with so many weights lifted; stick to the plan, you deserve the break to gather your wits!

**Randi** · 12-02-2007, 01:10 PM

SAS, I believe you will be making the right decision - keeping a job where you get stressed is just no good! Your health is much more important!! I too will rather live on a low budget than coming home exhausted from a job I hate, so I fully understand you. Do you have the option of going part time?

Getting your mom in to an assisted place, will take a load off your shoulders, and I do hope you’ll find a place that she likes. Are there long waiting lists like here?

You can be the strong one for only so long, until it all crashes on you, and then, you won’t be of any help to your mom or to yourself, so take some time off to think about things, relax and do the things YOU like!

I wish you the best of luck with it all, and please keep us updated!

Big hugs from,
Randi

**Barbara** · 12-02-2007, 01:24 PM

Sas you know how much I bear with you. This last year has been a little bit too much, even for the strong person you are.
I send you all my best wishes and warmest hugs. When you are really down in life the roads will start to lead upwards.

**sasvermont** · 12-02-2007, 01:30 PM

Thank you for your oh so positive comments.

My Mom will have a choice of where she goes if she is ok with going somewhere outside the major city of Burlington. Since she is totally unfamiliar with the area anyway, the only person being inconvenienced is me. So I am going to concentrate on the timing rather than the distance. I have already inquired with a couple of folks who already have grandparents at assisted living. So I have a few places in mind. Once I visit the place(s) it will be a matter of making the arrangements to have furniture moved etc.

I doubt if my Mom will care much either way, as she has severe short term memory loss. One day just blurrs into the next. Sounds like my life...... anyway, she will be easy, and she has been in assisted living before. She grew tired of it and so did I. Now, I just don't have the strength to keep up her care 24/7...... although she is independent in many ways, she depends on me for all her food/pills/thinking...... but she can dress herself and feed herself. She does not prepare food.

The job thing, well, this has happened before. I worked in Phila. before this job and burned out there too. I left on good terms - and I left. That is what I need to do here too. The big difference is that at this current place, no one knows my job. At the Phila. firm, I had an understudy and she stepped right in. She didn't last long, but that is another story.

So thanks for your positive thoughts. I need all the support I can get. Isn't it funny how sometimes one is soooo strong and confident and then whammo, the next thing you know you feel like you are twelve and can't fight your way out of a wet paperbag. Boy do I feel like the paperbag owns me right now.

I must be strong. And I know that I am not twelve! I still feel like it when I talk to my furry friends......and smile......they ground me when times are tough.

Thanks for listening.

P. S. Has anyone heard from NicoleJ other than that sad post a couple of days ago? I am worried about her.

**Catsnclay** · 12-02-2007, 04:25 PM

Just adding my .2 cents here, and I am sure you know about this, but just in case.....

I don't know the name of the program in Vermont, but here in AZ it is Medicaid, and if or when your mother runs short of money, this program will kick in and continue to pay for her assisted living arraingments - provided the home she is going to accepts this.

My mother put her aunt in a home, thinking she would pass before she ran out of money - WRONG!!!!

My mother now has to either come up with the monthly fee herself or move her 94 year old aunt who needs full attention because she had a stroke a year ago that has left her totally paralzed

both my sister & I warned her, but she thought she knew what she was doing.......

So the moral here is, be prepared!!!

Good luck on finding a new job, you will be surprised on how many doors will open for you now that you have made your decision

**lizbud** · 12-02-2007, 04:53 PM

Originally Posted by sasvermont

The job thing, well, this has happened before. I worked in Phila. before this job and burned out there too. I left on good terms - and I left. That is what I need to do here too. The big difference is that at this current place, no one knows my job. At the Phila. firm, I had an understudy and she stepped right in. She didn't last long, but that is another story.

Please don't make this your problem, it isn't. It was up to them to cross
train people, not you. That said, I am wishing you the very best of luck
and good timing to do the things you need to do for yourself.

I suspect
you are a strong person and I know you will be so much happier.

**Vermontcat** · 12-02-2007, 05:11 PM

Sas, I hope things get better for you soon.
Good luck with finding a new job and finding a nice place for your mom.
This month is really busy for me with work and our house renovations but maybe in January we can get together, there's always the Cat Show to go to!

Let me know if there's anything I can do for you, I'm not that far away from you.
Hugs to you and all the Campers too.

**Ginger's Mom** · 12-02-2007, 05:15 PM

Prayers and good thoughts going out to you. I am not sure what your plans are for assisted living, but medicare will not pay for anything until you have used up all but $2000.00 of the patients money. In my area many of the private facilities do not take medicare at all, those that do (they only take a certain percentage) have a waiting list of anywhere from two-five years. But there may be public (state run) facilities in your area that will take medicare right away. Good luck with all of your plans, I will keep you on my prayer list.

**krazyaboutkatz** · 12-02-2007, 06:00 PM

SAS, I'm sorry to hear that you've been under so much stress lately and I hope that everything will work out for you and your mom in the future. You'll remain in my thoughts and prayers. Please take care.

**moosmom** · 12-02-2007, 08:47 PM

SAS,

There comes a time when decisions like that have to be made in order to find peace for yourself. It took me 12 years of working for attorneys on top of caring for my elderly Dad to figure that out. But you know that.

You're in my prayers, Sallyanne. Remember to take care of yourself and breath!!

Love and (((((HUGS))))))

Donna