Am I just clearly annoyed or jealous?

[BC_MoM]

I can see how that would get annoying. If he's there the majority of the time, I think he should be paying for utilities, or something.

[Laura's Babies]

I would flat out ask him if he has moved in since he is there all the time.. It is time to divy up all the bills 3 ways if he is going to be there all the time.

I have mostly lived alone but have had room mates from time to time and that does cause the bills to be larger... add another and they go up even more. If she wants to pay his part, that would be fine but I wouldn't foot the bill for HER boyfriend.. 2 days a week end does not equal 7 days...

I would also ask her to get a TV in HER room and for them to stay in there so you can enjoy your living room when you want to.

(I am so fussy that I REFUSE to have anyone sleeping on my sofa on a regular basis)

[Twisterdog]

Well, that's a tough call. Because she pays half the bills, it's as much her apartment as it is yours. And if you two didn't sit down and discuss issues like this BEFORE you moved in together, then it's going to be hard to legitimately try to implement them now.

Some people are more social than others. Some people think of their home as a calm sanctuary to get away from people (me) and some people think their home is empty and lonely unless it is full of their friends all the time. Neither way is right or wrong, but if one of each type are roommates, it's hard to live together.

I personally do not think you have the right to tell her that her boyfriend can only come over on certain days or certain times, etc. It IS her home, too. I do, however, think you are well within your rights to establish which areas of the house are common areas and which are private areas. I had to do this with my kids.

I would say you each can have whatever guests you want to at any times or days, as long as you are in your own rooms. Obviously, that has to include use of the kitchen and bathroom for reasonable periods, but "hanging out" needs to be in her own room. Same with you. The common area of the house, i.e. the living room, needs to be "neutral territory" where, unless you both agree to host a party or dinner or whatever, then only the residents of the home are there.

That's the rule my kids have ... if your friends spend the night, day, weekend, etc., they will be in your room. Not making noise and mess in the living room. It works.