I waitressed and bartended for about 13 years off and on, and I so agree with you. Some things that people might not realize.

Servers do not usually get fringe benefits. Most have to pay any insurance or retirement plan out of pocket, so if you think they make too much money, realize that they have their own payroll expenses.

The minimum wage for servers is $2 to $4 less that the national minimum wage. The argument that other workers get minimum wage without tips and do fine doesn't stack up. Also, servers do not get raises, so there are no merit raises, cost of living raises, etc.

The serving jobs where they make over $400 are few and far between. Most servers make between $250 and $400 in the majority of establishments (before taxes) - add into the costs for their own health insurance and retirement and that figure decreases dramatically. Try to make a living making that kind of money. Many servers are single parents with children at home and that is their only income. These women will probably always have to work and have little or no prospect of retirement. I feel bad for these women.

Serving is HARD WORK. It is physically and emotionally draining. Try being happy and cheerful for a 10 hour shift with no breaks, verbal abuse, cleaning other people's messes, dealing with rudeness throughout your shift. You are on your feet running for the entire time. I used to come home with my legs throbbing so bad that I couldn't sleep. Cleaning up after the shift can take over an hour - at the same $4.00 an hour.

Back of house issues are not the server's fault - yet directly impacts the money she/he makes. Cold food, slow food, under or over cooked food have nothing to do with the server's performance. If you have these issues, talk to a manager, don't stiff the server.

I'll add one more to Anna's list:

You aren't the only table I have - try to get all requests for your table so the server only has to make one trip. If every time I go back to your table I have to get something else for a member of your party, it is taking away from the time I can spend at my other tables - which will affect my tip from them. I don't know how many times I have gotten a drink for a table and every time I deliver it - someone else at the table asks for a drink themselves. ONE TRIP PLEASE!

I'm not saying you have to tip for bad service, just be considerate of the person that is trying their best to make a living.

JMHO