Oh Jenn, I completely know what you are going through. I started out on Prozac, which worked for a while but then quit on me (as it does tend to do for many). I switched to Effexor, which worked well for me for several years. I tried to go completely off everything when I wanted to get pregnant. I was anti-depressant-less for about 2 months and about as miserable as I could get. I talked to the doctor about it and she said I could take Prozac throughout my pregnancy, so I went back on that. Seems to be working ok. Soon I have to switch to Zoloft, which is the safest to take when breastfeeding. I have been lucky that the meds worked for me. My mother, on the other hand, went through many different medications before she found something that worked. She ended up on a couple different kinds (can't remember what they all are) but that seems to be working. I know it's discouraging to keep trying meds that aren't working, but keep trying them! Something out there will work, you may just have to try different meds and doses.
There are cases of people commiting suicide while on anti-depressants, and having suicidal thoughts. Usually this happens because the person is on the wrong medication or dose. They think that since the medication isn't making them all better that they will never feel better and why bother living? Don't give up, there is something out there that works for you. ((((hugs)))) I am here if you ever need to talk!
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