Our PT joke thread

[CathyBogart]

FALL CLASSES FOR MEN
REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED BY Monday, October 23, 2007
NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL
OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM.
Classes begin Monday, October 30, 2007

Class 1
How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Trays --- Step by Step, with Slide Presentation.
Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM .

Class 2
The Toilet Paper Roll --- Does It Change Itself?
Round Table Discussion.
Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours.

Class 3
Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat and
Avoiding The Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub? --- Group Practice.
Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 4
Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper and The Floor ---
Pictures and Explanatory Graphics.
Meets Saturday at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.

Class 5
After Dinner Dishes --- Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Kitchen Sink?
Examples on Video.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.

Class 6
Loss Of Identity --- Losing The Remote To Your Significant Other.
Help Line Support and Support Groups.
Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM.

Class 7
Learning How To Find Things --- Starting With Looking In The Right Places
And Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming.
Open Forum.
Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.

Class 8
Health Watch --- Bringing Her Flowers Is Not Harmful To Your Health.
Graphics and Audio Tapes.
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 9
Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost --- Real Life Testimonials.
Tuesday at 6:00 PM Location to be determined.

Class 10
Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks?
Driving Simulations.
4 weeks, Saturday noon, 2 hours.

Class 11
Learning to Live --- Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife.
Online Classes and role-playing .
Tuesday at 7:00 PM, location to be determined.

Class 12
How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion
Relaxation Exercises, Meditation and Breathing Techniques.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours ! Beginning at 7 :00 PM.

Class 13
How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy --- Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries and Other Important Dates and Calling When You 're Going To Be Late. Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered.
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 14
The Stove/Oven --- What It Is and How It Is Used.
Live Demonstration.
Tuesday at 6:00 PM, location to be determined.
Upon completion of any of the above courses, diplomas will be issued to the survivors.

[CathyBogart]

Just one more...sorry, got a bit carried away.

FALL CLASSES FOR WOMEN
REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED BY Monday, October 23, 2007
NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL
OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM.
Classes begin Monday, October 30, 2007

Class 1
How To be quiet while the TV is on
Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM .

Class 2
Spiders, physical dimensions and fragility.
Extermination techniques demonstrated, (Shoes and brooms available for rental).
Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours.

Class 3
Mirrors, how they work, use of Spouse to dispute
Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 4
Being a passenger, how to refrain from critiques, The proper way to be invisible.
Advanced course on restraint from adjusting the stereo
Meets Saturday at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.

Class 5
Refrigerator Storage and priority.
Beer temperatures explained
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.

Class 6
Tolerance, understanding that your spouse is compelled to ogle young women.
Explanations and diagrams disputing that looking at young tight bodied men is not the same for you.
Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM.

Class 7
Tools, hazards and dangers of use without direct supervision.
first quarter explaining how to identify a Phillips screwdriver
Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.

Class 8
Driving, returning home with the car in the same condition it left.
Cell phones are not a head rest explained.
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.