Kim,

While I can understand your frustration, I really can, I can also give you another side of the coin.

When my Dad hooked up with my stepmother (4 months after my mom passed away), they were inseparable and caused a lot of tension between me and my father. At the time I was only 19 and was stuck babysitting for her youngest daughter Lynn while they went on dates.

After living together for 7 years (he left her once after he found her in bed with another man, figures...) they got married. It was a constant struggle for me and my daughter (his only grandchild) to have a relationship with him. The whole world revolved around her and HER children and grandchildren. My daughter and I were afterthoughts on holidays. My father's way of making up for it was to hand us $20 here and there. It was bad enough that I lost my Mom at such an early age. But to lose my father over something like that was truly unfair. Barbara and I couldn't stand each other and made no bones about it. My Dad and I had a standing "date" every Thursday for lunch at a local tavern after his golf game. I felt like I was cheating . But it was the only way I could talk to my Dad about things that I didn't feel were any of "Bab's" business. It was only after she died (they were together a total of 20 years) that I was finally able to have a decent relationship with Dad, even if it was through his vodka haze.

That's MY side of being a step kid. I was also in a relationship years ago with a guy who had two kids. Would I ever do it again??? HE** no!!! I'm single for the rest of my natural life and loving every minute of it.

Let Grant realize on his own what's going on. I'm sure eventually, if he hasn't already, a light bulb will go on in his head.

(((((HUGS)))))) to you dear friend.