Any way the moral to this story is: sit down, in person with BF (or whatever) and ask him directly - where is this relationship going??? What are WE doing? If he hyms & haws, dump him. He is not worth your time, and I think you know this already.........sorry.

Cats - that is exactly what we just did. While I cared about him, I had stopped caring about any relationship a while back, because I was tired of waiting. That's exactly what I said. I also acknowledged that his new life, with new job and all, had him stretched...and that was not good either. I said that this type of situation does ANY relationship no good at all.

He replied, and said that perhaps nothing had changed - just that it was out in the open. We do like each other, and enjoy each other's company. He's not looking, but I can "look" (which I am not). He said that he just can't give me the time I deserve (DA-DA!).

We are taking the friendship part and keeping that.

This may not sound like so much in words, but it is a huge relief. No more putting square pegs in round holes!

Reading more into it? LOL I was reading a BLANK SHEET and wanting to discuss with the other writer. As far as my feelings I wasn't in a relationship any more.

He thinks that with all he has going on right now, he should stay single. AMEN. I agreed.

Am glad this all cleared the air...even if I had to have the cojones to do it!

No no no.....you have to discuss this sort of thing face to face, preferably privately, so if you don't get the answers you want, you can kick him in the cobblers and get away with it.
Now, now...friends don't kick each other in the """""""!