We hear you. We understand.

Here's a thought: The cat rescue where I used to volunteer would go and speak to people like that about the importance of neuter/spay.

They would even take the cats to their own low-cost vet for neuter/spay and then return them. They felt this was one more aspect of saving cat lives and frankly preferable to finding homes for unwanted kittens.

Perhaps you could call a local rescue and ask their advice? Maybe they'll help.

Now, I don't remember seeing pictures of your sweet shadow...hint hint.