Hubby refuses to take his meds -- help!

[catnapper]

Thanks guys.

I know nagging never gets anyone anywhere. My style of nagging is when he's exploding to tell him he wouldn't be exploding if he was taking the pills, to which he responds he wouldn't be exploding if we didn't give him something to explode about. Otherwise, I comment once a week or so that he still has the same number of pills in the bottle. Or I comment to family with him there that he's not taking the pills, and they all gasp in surprise and tell him he HAS to. He ignores it all.

While I agree with him that the kids are leaving the house in a state of disaster now that they're out of school, rather than exploding, get them to DO something. Though last night, I never saw kids scatter to clean so fast... MOPPING the kitchen floor (whodathunkit?!) and scrubbing the tub. Even bleaching the shower curtain liner!

Half our fights are the kids and what they've done to the house. The other half is the fact that I can't hear anything with my allergies clogging my head. On top of muffled sounds courtesy all of hte snot swimming in my head, we always have either the windows open or AC units running; the noise of either just blocks anything and everything out. I turn up the TV REALLY high to compensate and hear it. Then I never hear the phone or other noises in the house. So now I'm going to call the doctor to get tested to find out there's nothing they can do, except to wait til the fall. I went through all the testing a few years ago to no solution. But if it means he'll stop exploding on me because I can't hear, I'll go through the tests and incurr a couple hundred dollars worth of medical bills.

If it wasn't for his BP, he would logically know I can't hear right now. Instead, he explodes when I don't hear the phone. He SWEARS I am just being lazy and pretend I don't hear it so I don't have to answer it. He honestly thinks I'm acting!!!! He's GOT to be kidding. I'm not a good actor and certainly would not be this comprehensive and consistent.

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Hubby is not on any of those meds. He's on Benicar. I don't have time to research it at this moment.... but I will! I've only seen GOOD come from him taking it. His personality becomes wonderful, the man I married. I can tell the moment he's off it because his personality changes into this awful short tempered man. A serious Dr. Jekyl and Mr. Hyde scenario.

I LOVE LOVE LOVE the idea of a personal BP machine. We do not have the money for it but live right behind a drug store that has one in store, so I'll walk over with him to get a BP reading. If it comes up 120/80 or below, I'll keep quiet and seriously try to change myself and listen to what he's complaining about. I told him calmly last night that I worry about him. That I'll shut up if he agrees to a BP test. He REFUSES to go to the doctor.

[Pam]

Hubby is not on any of those meds. He's on Benicar. I don't have time to research it at this moment.... but I will! I've only seen GOOD come from him taking it. His personality becomes wonderful, the man I married.

Kim, my doctor put me on Benicar (samples) when I was first diagnosed with high BP. When I found out that my insurance wouldn't cover Benicar, he switched me to Diovan which is the exact same medicine as Benicar although my insurance does pay for Diovan. We have a "tier program" for our prescriptions. Don't know if you are familiar with tier programs.

Anyway, there is nothing about Benicar or Diovan that causes mood changes. There are some anti-depressants that will do that, though, if the patient stops them. I have a friend who had this happen when she quit her anti-depressants.

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Tell him if he won't take his bp med, at least increase the amount of his life insurance !!!! Maybe that will shock him into taking it.

Most of the blood pressure meds tell you not to stop taking it suddenly. That alone can give you a heart attack. I'm on 4 myself. My doctor told me it's not if I have a heart attack but WHEN if we didn't get it down.

I bought a wrist bp monitor and take it every day. Mine is now in the normal range most of the time.

When mine gets high, I feel like I'm going to explode, which is probably why he gets so cranky. I'd rather take my meds than feel like that!!!

My doctor tried me on both Benicar and Diovan. I couldn't take them. They made me so dizzy I could hardly walk. Since I live by myself. I have to be able to function. Meds work differently on different people, I guess.

[Pam]

I thought I'd better re-visit this thread since it is an important one. We all have things occur during the day which can make our blood boil. I know that I would not want to be without my blood pressure medicine when that happens. It doesn't calm me down or help me cope but it might just stop my pressure from going totally through the roof. I really hope your hubby starts taking it again. Of course he knows that heart disease goes hand in hand with high BP but remind him that strokes can also be caused by high BP. As someone who has seen family members stricken with strokes, it would almost be better to die of a heart attack. You are paralyzed and dependent on everyone for every need that you have. You lose your dignity in such a situation and I believe that is what my own dad had so much trouble dealing with. It is all very heartbreaking. Please, Kim's hubby, take your medicine!

[catnapper]

My doctor tried me on both Benicar and Diovan. I couldn't take them. They made me so dizzy I could hardly walk. Since I live by myself. I have to be able to function. Meds work differently on different people, I guess.

Silly me.... it never occured to me that he might be experiencing side effects like dizziness. He DID complain it makes him pee more. It never, ever occured to me that he might not like the dizziness. Thats why I stopped taking the meds for my PCOS.... its was AWFUL. He's such a quiet guy that its just like him to not want to complain about something like that. DUH!

Now I wonder how I'll get him to the doctor to try another drug. Getting him to the doctor is like pulling teeth. I basically have to promise something stupid just to show him I'm willing to do something even though I don't want to.... I'm good with it as long as it doesn't involve sporting events, especially minor league baseball!

LOL... I'm reading my description of him as a quiet guy. He really is, when he's not exploding over every little thing.

[joycenalex]

[QUOTE=catnapper]... He DID complain it makes him pee more. ...end quote
um, some BP meds can affect the prostate, and for some men there are other side effects, and these can be intolerable. FWIW

[Pawsitive Thinking]

Some BP meds are diuretics (sp) which will explain the peeing more and others are beta blockers. Might be worth checking which ones he is on.

Also they do take a while to get used to so keep stopping and starting the drugs isn't going to help in the long run

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Some BP meds are diuretics (sp) which will explain the peeing more and others are beta blockers. Might be worth checking which ones he is on.

One of the first BP meds I was on was a diuretic. It made me so miserable! I couldn't go anywhere except the bathroom. It also depleted my potassium. My doctor switched me to another one and I only need it every other day. (of course I take 3 other meds every day) It doesn't make me live in the bathroom like the other one did. He really needs to chat with his doctor.

Good luck!

[karyn674]

Hello Catnapper,

Like your husband I'm a person who don't like to take medicines at all. What I do is take alternative medicine! We all know that medicines fix one end and harm the other, so it take the natural way of solving my health problems whenever I can.

My mother suffers from high blood pressure too and she also has an irregular heart beat and she does take her medications on a daily basis. BUT I have introduced her to using Garlic and Chillies which are both ingredients known to lower high blood pressure.

My book which bears the name of Healing Foods says:

Chillies:

Properties-an excelent source if vitamins especially C, minerals,flavonoids, fibre and carbohydrates.

Health benefits-contain compounds essential for maintaining good health and prevention of disease. Capsaicinmakes the eyes and nose 'run', thus acting as a decongestant. Chillies may also help to lower blood pressure, thin the blood nd reduce cholesterol levels, all of which protect the heart and circulation.

Garlic:

Properties-contains several active substances, includingsulphur compunds, which are responsable for the pungent, aromatic flavour

Health benefits-has anti-viral and anti-bacterial properties and recent studies have shown that eating raw garlic cloves reduces nasal congestion, bronchitis and cold symptoms and protects against reinfection. Compounds in garlic help to lower blood pressure and reduce levels of blood cholesterol, hence protecting the heart and circulation. It has been claimed that garlic may protect against certain cancers but there is no scientific evidence for this. Cooking may reduce galic's health benefits.

If the taste is too strong one still can swollow the galic cloves whole....like a pill.

Mum introduced both the chillies and the garlic in her cooking and her blood pressure reduced considerably, she now takes half the medicine she used to take and became subject to low blood pressure......she sometimes faints due to this!

So, you see you can help your husband in feeling better and please change the cooking but tell him nothing to why you're doing this. You'll be doing what you can in helping him .........secretly!

Good luck! Wish you both all the best!

Karen

[catnapper]

So, you see you can help your husband in feeling better and please change the cooking but tell him nothing to why you're doing this. You'll be doing what you can in helping him .........secretly!

Kinda hard when I don't do the cooking. I am proud of myself if I cut up a pineapple. Hubby does the cooking. He buys the food. I just sit back and eat what he prepares.

Though natural is a good idea, he won't do that any more than he'd take his pills. First, he thinks natural remedies are all hippie-dippy stuff and rolls his eyes (note this is not my opinion). Second, he doesn't think there's a problem: hence his resistence to taking the pills in the first place.

[Rachel]

You might want to look up information on the DASH diet. Basically it is pretty much eating healthy, fruits and vegetables, etc. but I don't want to over simplify and interpret it here by saying that. Losing some weight should also be quite beneficial on the BP.

Forget about the more life insurance aspect. The first thing they are going to do when you apply is have someone come out and take his blood pressure. Years ago my husband's blood pressure was just a bit on the high side. His doctor (who he is diligent in seeing regularly) didn't think it was anything to be concerned about. Around that time we applied for some additional life insurance for him, and they turned him down...because of his blood pressure reading. Well, I figured if the insurance company thought it was a reason to not take our money, it was something to be concerned about and his doctor reconsidered. My husband and I both are on the meds for BP and that insurance company lost out on over 10 years of premiums.

It is very common to have try different medications if one has side effects or isn't working properly. As for getting your husband to take care of himself, you seems to have tried a number of approaches which haven't worked. Is there a time when you can sit down to calmly discuss the issue?