Hubby refuses to take his meds -- help!

[Pawsitive Thinking]

Denise, the thing is this man has been told all the stuff about health and etc and leaving little Cam without a grandad, etc. It doesn't seem to have worked.

I think if he's left to make his own decision, he will.

Let's hope he comes to his senses before it is too late

In the meantime don't mention the subject to him again - ultimately it is his choice I guess

[Pam]

Kim I sympathize as my hubby hasn't even gone for a physical in years and years. High cholesterol runs in his family and I am really worried. He said that years ago his cholesterol was fine. Doesn't he realize that those numbers can change? I find that the more I nag, the more he digs in his heels. I am thinking of just going ahead and making that appointment. I doubt he'd cancel.

I don't know that personality change is related to BP medications. I take a blood pressure lowering medication and have never been told/warned of that as a side effect. I am thinking that maybe something else is going on with your hubby which might be causing his outbursts. Most men aren't very communicative when it comes to what is bothering them, unlike us women who will tell any listening ear!

[sparks19]

I am sorry you are dealing with this I really know nothing about high BP and the meds and stuff but I think you have gotten some good advice here.

All I can offer is my best wishes for you and yours. Good luck and I hope he comes to his senses soon.

[catnapper]

Thanks guys.

I know nagging never gets anyone anywhere. My style of nagging is when he's exploding to tell him he wouldn't be exploding if he was taking the pills, to which he responds he wouldn't be exploding if we didn't give him something to explode about. Otherwise, I comment once a week or so that he still has the same number of pills in the bottle. Or I comment to family with him there that he's not taking the pills, and they all gasp in surprise and tell him he HAS to. He ignores it all.

While I agree with him that the kids are leaving the house in a state of disaster now that they're out of school, rather than exploding, get them to DO something. Though last night, I never saw kids scatter to clean so fast... MOPPING the kitchen floor (whodathunkit?!) and scrubbing the tub. Even bleaching the shower curtain liner!

Half our fights are the kids and what they've done to the house. The other half is the fact that I can't hear anything with my allergies clogging my head. On top of muffled sounds courtesy all of hte snot swimming in my head, we always have either the windows open or AC units running; the noise of either just blocks anything and everything out. I turn up the TV REALLY high to compensate and hear it. Then I never hear the phone or other noises in the house. So now I'm going to call the doctor to get tested to find out there's nothing they can do, except to wait til the fall. I went through all the testing a few years ago to no solution. But if it means he'll stop exploding on me because I can't hear, I'll go through the tests and incurr a couple hundred dollars worth of medical bills.

If it wasn't for his BP, he would logically know I can't hear right now. Instead, he explodes when I don't hear the phone. He SWEARS I am just being lazy and pretend I don't hear it so I don't have to answer it. He honestly thinks I'm acting!!!! He's GOT to be kidding. I'm not a good actor and certainly would not be this comprehensive and consistent.

-------------------------------------

Hubby is not on any of those meds. He's on Benicar. I don't have time to research it at this moment.... but I will! I've only seen GOOD come from him taking it. His personality becomes wonderful, the man I married. I can tell the moment he's off it because his personality changes into this awful short tempered man. A serious Dr. Jekyl and Mr. Hyde scenario.

I LOVE LOVE LOVE the idea of a personal BP machine. We do not have the money for it but live right behind a drug store that has one in store, so I'll walk over with him to get a BP reading. If it comes up 120/80 or below, I'll keep quiet and seriously try to change myself and listen to what he's complaining about. I told him calmly last night that I worry about him. That I'll shut up if he agrees to a BP test. He REFUSES to go to the doctor.

[Pam]

Hubby is not on any of those meds. He's on Benicar. I don't have time to research it at this moment.... but I will! I've only seen GOOD come from him taking it. His personality becomes wonderful, the man I married.

Kim, my doctor put me on Benicar (samples) when I was first diagnosed with high BP. When I found out that my insurance wouldn't cover Benicar, he switched me to Diovan which is the exact same medicine as Benicar although my insurance does pay for Diovan. We have a "tier program" for our prescriptions. Don't know if you are familiar with tier programs.

Anyway, there is nothing about Benicar or Diovan that causes mood changes. There are some anti-depressants that will do that, though, if the patient stops them. I have a friend who had this happen when she quit her anti-depressants.

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Tell him if he won't take his bp med, at least increase the amount of his life insurance !!!! Maybe that will shock him into taking it.

Most of the blood pressure meds tell you not to stop taking it suddenly. That alone can give you a heart attack. I'm on 4 myself. My doctor told me it's not if I have a heart attack but WHEN if we didn't get it down.

I bought a wrist bp monitor and take it every day. Mine is now in the normal range most of the time.

When mine gets high, I feel like I'm going to explode, which is probably why he gets so cranky. I'd rather take my meds than feel like that!!!

My doctor tried me on both Benicar and Diovan. I couldn't take them. They made me so dizzy I could hardly walk. Since I live by myself. I have to be able to function. Meds work differently on different people, I guess.

[Pam]

I thought I'd better re-visit this thread since it is an important one. We all have things occur during the day which can make our blood boil. I know that I would not want to be without my blood pressure medicine when that happens. It doesn't calm me down or help me cope but it might just stop my pressure from going totally through the roof. I really hope your hubby starts taking it again. Of course he knows that heart disease goes hand in hand with high BP but remind him that strokes can also be caused by high BP. As someone who has seen family members stricken with strokes, it would almost be better to die of a heart attack. You are paralyzed and dependent on everyone for every need that you have. You lose your dignity in such a situation and I believe that is what my own dad had so much trouble dealing with. It is all very heartbreaking. Please, Kim's hubby, take your medicine!

[catnapper]

My doctor tried me on both Benicar and Diovan. I couldn't take them. They made me so dizzy I could hardly walk. Since I live by myself. I have to be able to function. Meds work differently on different people, I guess.

Silly me.... it never occured to me that he might be experiencing side effects like dizziness. He DID complain it makes him pee more. It never, ever occured to me that he might not like the dizziness. Thats why I stopped taking the meds for my PCOS.... its was AWFUL. He's such a quiet guy that its just like him to not want to complain about something like that. DUH!

Now I wonder how I'll get him to the doctor to try another drug. Getting him to the doctor is like pulling teeth. I basically have to promise something stupid just to show him I'm willing to do something even though I don't want to.... I'm good with it as long as it doesn't involve sporting events, especially minor league baseball!

LOL... I'm reading my description of him as a quiet guy. He really is, when he's not exploding over every little thing.

[joycenalex]

[QUOTE=catnapper]... He DID complain it makes him pee more. ...end quote
um, some BP meds can affect the prostate, and for some men there are other side effects, and these can be intolerable. FWIW

[karyn674]

Hello Catnapper,

Like your husband I'm a person who don't like to take medicines at all. What I do is take alternative medicine! We all know that medicines fix one end and harm the other, so it take the natural way of solving my health problems whenever I can.

My mother suffers from high blood pressure too and she also has an irregular heart beat and she does take her medications on a daily basis. BUT I have introduced her to using Garlic and Chillies which are both ingredients known to lower high blood pressure.

My book which bears the name of Healing Foods says:

Chillies:

Properties-an excelent source if vitamins especially C, minerals,flavonoids, fibre and carbohydrates.

Health benefits-contain compounds essential for maintaining good health and prevention of disease. Capsaicinmakes the eyes and nose 'run', thus acting as a decongestant. Chillies may also help to lower blood pressure, thin the blood nd reduce cholesterol levels, all of which protect the heart and circulation.

Garlic:

Properties-contains several active substances, includingsulphur compunds, which are responsable for the pungent, aromatic flavour

Health benefits-has anti-viral and anti-bacterial properties and recent studies have shown that eating raw garlic cloves reduces nasal congestion, bronchitis and cold symptoms and protects against reinfection. Compounds in garlic help to lower blood pressure and reduce levels of blood cholesterol, hence protecting the heart and circulation. It has been claimed that garlic may protect against certain cancers but there is no scientific evidence for this. Cooking may reduce galic's health benefits.

If the taste is too strong one still can swollow the galic cloves whole....like a pill.

Mum introduced both the chillies and the garlic in her cooking and her blood pressure reduced considerably, she now takes half the medicine she used to take and became subject to low blood pressure......she sometimes faints due to this!

So, you see you can help your husband in feeling better and please change the cooking but tell him nothing to why you're doing this. You'll be doing what you can in helping him .........secretly!

Good luck! Wish you both all the best!

Karen

[moosmom]

hubby shot darts from his eyes

THAT is known as the "hairy eyeball". Chilling, isn't it??

I agree with Candace. You've told him how ya feel, now drop it and go out, get a nice BIG insurance policy and a BP kit at CVS.

I don't kow what it is with guys and doctors. They have this fear of them that I just don't get.

[davidpizzica]

Kim, I hope your husband comes around. Myself I've hit bottom twice in the last four years. First it was finding out that I am diabetic and the second blow was my Atrial Fibrillation. Now I have to take a drug store full of medicines and have my blood drawn twice a week to monitor the Coumadin, to keep myself controlled from those two. Not all guys refuse to take medicines or go to the doctor's office or in my case be in the hospital twice so far this year!

[Laura's Babies]

For your allergy problem, have you tried those sinus flush kits or a neti pot? Years ago, I had allergy and sinus problems and started flushing them out myself. It is non addictive, you can do it as many times a day as you need to, it is CHEAP and it works so GOOD! It stings like he** when you first do it because your sinuses are inflamed but after about the 3rd time, it just makes you feel so good, you can't wait to do it again.. It settled my allergy problem like you wouldn't believe, and the best part... NO side effects other than feeling 100% better!

You can get a neti pot like you see here http://www.luckyvitamin.com/079565005133.html

Use bottled water and noniodized salt and make your own flush solution like I did for years.

$$ Cost wise, the only thing it costs you is the pot that is reused for years if you need it , a box of non idoized salt and bottled water, cheap when I think of all the years of medicines I bought.

The results are unbelievable.

[cyber-sibes]

Geesh, I hate it when they're behavior makes ya so mad ya don't know whether to fight or cry!
After being taken by ambulence to the hosp. & told he had an "episode" with his heart & should go see his doctor, my hubby put off going through with the testing for MONTHS. I finally said to him "Well, you've talked about wanting to just check out (had some very stressful events), so I guess here's your chance - Just don't do anything about it." He went to the doctors shortly thereafter.

As mentioned, nagging doesn't help. He has to hurt enough to want to stop hurting. Pray that it doesn't cost him his life while he's deciding.

[Catty1]

Kim - would it help to see YOUR doctor and ask for advice?

Though if he is going to the store with you to use the BP kit there, I hope that does something.

Maybe he doesn't like his doctor? He can get another one.

Prayers going out to you!

ALSO - when I had chronic sinus problems, I got a baby ear syringe, would gently warm some filtered water (about 1/3 c), dissolve some salt in it. The I would tilt my head back, and inhale thru my nose as I put the salt water in.

Don't make it TOO salty. The salt also is a bit of an antiseptic. It worked like a charm for me. I use it when I have a cold too.

(PS - have a few kleenexes handy! )