Is it me???

[Laura's Babies]

Catty1 wrote

Recommended a good counsellor for her! Life's too short to be bullied for all of it!

She is right 100%!

He probably treats everyone like that so she probably has no friends.... and he would have caused a scene if she had refused to go and she knew it.. You can bet he knew you were invited to stay for dinner too and that is why he did that.

I would let her know I didn't appreciate being put on the spot like that, it is her life and she can live that way if she wants to but please leave you out of being treated like that again! Then add, and I will cook you dinner when you have had enough of that jerk and leave him!

[Edwina's Secretary]

Sorry...I disagree...your friend knows her husband is a jerk. One time I gave a friend my opinion about her husband (and she had asked!) She went back with him and never spoke to me again.

I would decide whether I want to be friends with her in spite of her husband....but I don't offer unsolicited (or solicited) advice to anybody when it comes to relationships. If I decided to continue the friendship it would be non-judgementally.

[Catty1]

Not only a jerk...but abusive, perhaps?

The 'invisible wounds' they talk about...

Depending on how well you know her, you might meet her for coffee and ask if she is ok...if there is any help she needs. Just offer, and let her decide.

If you can Google a short list of symptoms of an emotionally abusive spouse and the abused one's symptoms...you might just want to hand it to her.

Maybe you'll lose a friendship. But maybe you'll save her life.

This looks good... http://www.lilaclane.com/relationships/emotional-abuse/

[dukedogsmom]

I'll bet she's emotionally abused from the sound of it. I've experienced it and it's horrible. They do like to isolate you and it also beats down your self esteem. He might even be physical with her or others. My ex beat on Duke but not me. It was a horrible time in my life. But I also agree that she has to make the decision she's had enough. Until then, you can't help her. It didn't take me long to decide I'd had it. The guy sounds horrible. No wonder you only want to talk to her while she's at work. That's probably the only freedom she has. I was hardly allowed to go anywhere by myself. I hope she decides on a better life soon.

[Kalei]

Wow, I would say a guy like that, the relationship is only to go downhill and end badly. I hope you friend will realize what's going on soon. I feel bad for her.

[wombat2u2004]

Wow, I would say a guy like that, the relationship is only to go downhill and end badly. I hope you friend will realize what's going on soon. I feel bad for her.

Trouble is tho...some women accept that sort of treatment as the norm all of their lives, and they just live with it until it's too late to do anything about it.
My partners ex used to sit on her on the lounge room floor, and methodically pound her face with his fists until she was unconscious....yet she stuck it out for 6 years....thinking that one day maybe it would get better. Also a lot of people (as in my partners case) are of the opinion that once you are married then you stay married......a sorry state of affairs for those who are subjected to abuse....it goes on more than you realise.
Wom