By Roger Friedman
Paris Hilton is out of jail and now the District Attorney is upset.
The whole thing has become ridiculous, hasn’t it? California officials are obsessed with humiliating a blonde heiress, a girl as dangerous as a dab of Cool Whip on Jell-O.
At the same time, they don’t seem to mind that O.J. Simpson, whom a civil jury found responsible for the deaths of two people, is playing golf in Florida and laughing at them as he cleverly makes deals to collect fees for books and autographs.
Robert Blake, tried for killing his wife, is snacking in Malibu. Michael Jackson, subject of one child molestation trial and several investigations, lives in Las Vegas in the lap of luxury, travels around the world, and still entertains children at home.
Phil Spector, while awaiting trial for an alleged murder committed three years ago, has lived at home in a mansion and never spent an hour in jail. It took two whole trials to put the Menendez brothers away for killing their parents.
But Paris Hilton? Dopey, self-absorbed, semi-literate, rich and an affront to the working man, she must pay for her crimes. This one, they’ve nailed.
She managed to get out of jail after three hours, but now the DA is threatening to put her back in. A home imprisonment with an ankle bracelet isn’t enough. They’re going to torture her in a bare cell, solitary confinement, for a month, until she learns her lesson.
If they couldn’t get Simpson, Jackson or Blake, and if they can’t get Spector, they’re going to get Paris Hilton to prove a point.
It’s too funny. But that’s California, and Los Angeles, specifically.
You know what guys? Leave her alone already. Pick on someone your own size.
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