Weddings ... a question of protocol?

[sparks19]

I know my sisters wedding has half of the people invited to the ceremony that there are invited to the reception. And.... if you have very young children it is almost torture for them to have to sit through the ceremony lol so some people might politely decline the ceremony but come to the reception so they do not risk disturbing the ceremony. But I know a LOT of people that had weddings where they only invited some people to the reception. and some people might feel uncomfortable being at a special event like that if they do not know the couple THAT well..... they might feel awkward surrounded by their family and very close friends. BUT.... if you RSVP'd YES that you would attend and then don't show without an explanation.... THAT is rude.

Besides...... the reception is when everyone brings the presents and the money for the bride and groom lol if they want to show up to only the reception to bring me presents.... I'm OK with that lol.

No one was invited to our wedding LOL. it was just the two of us and the JP.

[Glacier]

No one was invited to our wedding LOL. it was just the two of us and the JP.

Did you catch much flack for that? Our wedding was the same way pretty much. My folks, his Dad, us and the JP. Originally, even the parents weren't invited, but Stuart's an only child and very close to his Dad. My sister was mad at me for months! Until I took her three year for a week long vacation!

Where I grew up, it's customary to put an announcement in the paper with the details of the reception/dance and "Friends and family please accept this as your invitation". Formal invitations are sent only for the ceremony.

[DJFyrewolf36]

The place that held our ceremony was one of those drive thru type places in Reno you see on TV lol (odd thing is my parents and some of my best friends were married at the same place years ago, my parents are almost celebrating thier 30th anniversery and my friends are in the 40 year range). I know that if you wanted more than a cirtian number of people at the actual ceremony it cost extra. I know a lot of places (including casinos) that charge extra for attendence when it comes to the ceremony.

I think the reception is where the celebration starts anyhow

[Edwina's Secretary]

I am shocked and appalled by people who are invited to the wedding and the reception and only attend the reception. The ceremony is the REASON for the party...

I'm with Cataholic on this one. If you don't care about the couple enough to witness their marriage....how can you drink their booze?

And Marigold...the Catholic mass hasn't been in Latin since Vatican II...when I was a kid. I traveled to Indiana (from California) this weekend for a wedding. The wedding was Catholic...all in English and we did stand at the invitation of the priest...and sit ...but there wasn't any kneeling (to the great relief of many....)

An empty church on your wedding day...how sad!

[gini]

I think we are in an era of very bad manners. Weddings and receptions are very expensive events - and if you are invited to both, you should attend both, unless you have a bonafide reason.

These days you are lucky if you even receive a rsvp.

[mruffruff]

I have always thought that weddings were for the family and close friends and the reception was for everyone else, too. That's how mine was. We only had parents and a few friends at the wedding. The reception wasn't a sit-down affair, so everyone we knew came to toast us. Which they did to excess!

[catnapper]

I haven't been to many wedding lately, but the last few I attended were heavily attended at both the ceremony and reception. We did happen to miss my cousin's wedding but made it to the reception, but only because she had a friday night wedding and we couldn't get out of work in time. I'm probably going to miss my other cousin's wedding in September for the time AND the distance to get to the ceremony. A ton of people missed my brother's wedding because of the same reason. I wish my family would stop having friday night weddings! LOL

[Marigold2]

Weddings can still be in Latin if the couple requests it and if there is someone will to do the cereamony. My husband is an agnostic, he considers a Catholic mass in the same catagory as Indians beating on a drum to their sun gods. As a Lutheran I don't feel that way but I also don't embrace the Catholic mass or beliefs. For me standing up in the church like that is a lie.QUOTE=Edwina's Secretary]I am shocked and appalled by people who are invited to the wedding and the reception and only attend the reception. The ceremony is the REASON for the party...

I'm with Cataholic on this one. If you don't care about the couple enough to witness their marriage....how can you drink their booze?

And Marigold...the Catholic mass hasn't been in Latin since Vatican II...when I was a kid. I traveled to Indiana (from California) this weekend for a wedding. The wedding was Catholic...all in English and we did stand at the invitation of the priest...and sit ...but there wasn't any kneeling (to the great relief of many....)

An empty church on your wedding day...how sad![/QUOTE]

[Jessika]

I know for some people they send out separate invitations for the reception and wedding. Sometimes they can't afford a huge ceremony so only close family and friends are invited to the ceremony, but EVERYONE is invited to the reception.

Or as in my case, the chapel was much too far or dangerous of a drive (incliment weather) so it wasn't safe for them to travel to make the ceremony but the reception hall was just right down the street.