Quote Originally Posted by Pembroke_Corgi
I was one of those well-behaved children. I was obedient, polite, and quiet. I received straight A's and my teachers all loved me. I never once received a detention, or ever came close. Was I happy? Of course not, my father was a classic authoritarian parent and I was simply conditioned to behave that way. I would take a happy, normal child any day and I think that people who talk about "kids these days" are simply glossing over their own childhoods or are completely out of touch with kids.

I work with kids every single day and I can tell you that they are not anything like what I would think hearing some people describe them. They are fun to be around, and frankly they have minds of their own and don't need to be programmed like robots to think exactly what their parents think. Chances are, if parents are good role models the kids will pick up on that anyway, and they certainly don't need to be "kicked in the butt."

I also think that it's a good thing that exclusionary games are being removed from schools. Life is NEVER "sunshine and puppies" no matter what. But, why would you ever set your child up for disappointment if you could avoid it? That doesn't make sense to me, but then again neither does saying that all we really need is a kindergarten education. Guess I just wasted about 17 years of my life then, huh?
Well I didn't have an authoritative parent. I was happy as a child. I was just taught from the beginning that my actions had consequences. i was allowed to make my own decision but I was always told that making the wrong decision could result in consequences and those consequences were enforced. Doesn't mean my parents were strict or authoritative. There is a balance between teaching your kids right and wrong and being overbearing and overly strict. My parents were not strict..... they just made the rules very clear. I had to be home by curfew.... and I was. by no means what I a straight A student.... but I didn't steal, I didn't beat up other kids, I didn't run away from home, etc etc. children need a good balance of family, love and discipline. AND NEVER discipline while angry and after the punishment is doled out always sit down with your child and TALK about WHY they are being punished and always end with an "I love you very much". You don't have to beat your kids into submission or keep them under lock and key. Just teach them the rules from a very young age.... teach them respect..... compassion.... love.... and understanding. Discipline and following the rules is not programming them to believe what their parents believe..... telling a child they have to be home by 9 is not programming, telling them they have to be in bed by ten is not programming, telling them they have to eat some vegetables is not programming. They are RULEs. Everyone has rules, everyone has to follow rules, children included. AND they need to be given responsibilities in order to learn responsibility. My brother wouldn't let his kids be home alone after school when they were 14. I was babysitting when i was 11 (of course it was different times and there is more to worry about now) Kids need to earn trust.... and with trust comes freedom and responsibility. My mom trusted me because I didn't betray her trust, I was given a lot of freedom because I earned it. Was I a perfect child? HECK no lol. I had ATTITUDE and lots of it. Did I get away with back talk? no i didn't. but I still slammed my bedroom door and threw my tantrums lol.... but when it came to the big stuff, I could be trusted and I earned that. and that was a great feeling for me knowing that I had that freedom and I worked hard to get it.

Setting up your kid for disappointment? WHAT? lol. So they shouldn't play board games because they might not be good at them and lose and be disappointed? they shouldn't play sports because they might not be the best on the team and lose and be disappointed? Tag is no different. I wasn't the fastest kid in the yard..... I wasn't good at sports.... I wasn't the first kid picked for every game..... but it didn't destroy me for life. Kids will learn disappointment one way or another.... better to learn that you can't always win earlier in life rather than have them find out as a highschool student that life doesn't always give you what you want and then they SNAP. That's not setting a kid up for disappointment that's setting a kid up for life. they aren't always going to pass the test..... they aren't ALWAYS gonna get the girl/guy..... they aren't always gonna win the game..... they aren't always going to get their way. Why is that wrong? the point is that when disappointment happens they learn how to deal with it..... you as a parent sit down and talk to them about the game they lost or the test they didn't do so great on and tell them that they can't win all the time but if they tried their best and had a good time then the rest really isn't that big a deal and tell them how proud you are of them. that is not setting them up for disappointment. Sometimes they will win and that is great but they also have to learn to be a gracious winner. but sometimes they will lose and they have to learn not to be a sore loser, tomorrow is another day with new surprises and tomorrow that game or that test will just be a memory..... it will give them great coping skills for later in life (especially high school which is FULL of disappointments).

As for the "everything I learned about life I learned in Kindergarten" are you serious? You are seriously getting up in arms about that? lol it's just a saying. In other words.... in Kindergarten you learn to SHARE, and INTERACT, and they learn A LOT of basics for life. But now..... they shouldn't HAVE to share, they shouldn't HAVE to do anything they don't WANT to do, They shouldn't HAVE to clean up their own mess. http://www.peace.ca/kindergarten.htm Read it.... it's cute.... and true. It's a joke


EDITED TO ADD: LOL there are two different debates going on in one thread haha one about kids and one about guns. how often does that happen lol