Or...

He could come to canada, and be lost in a forest, freezing cold in the snow, hail and wind, and ice rain, all alone, walking through 3 feet of snow in -36 degrees temperature. Only to stumble upon a house where a young lady comes to the door and welcomes him into the warm house. He takes a seat in front of the fire and sings (in his pirate accent, no less) whilst playing the guitar. (which he was carrying with him in the snow.)

After being stranded for months with the beautiful, smart, and kind lady, he decides to marry her (she stops drooling over his hottness for a minute to say yes) and assume acting as a pirate with her in town for the rest of their days. (even though his days will, sadly, be a lot less than hers, because he is old enough to be her dad!!!)

Isn't that sad, that he will die before us? So eventually we will have to live in a Jack-less world.