Well, cats are cats and they basicaly accept to be the only one in charge, so don't make her do something she doesn't want to, better pet her or feed her beside you, not on your lap or arms. And if she wants to leave, let her leave when she wants. Try to stay in the same room with her minding your own business and eventually she'll come to you. Do it in small steps and you'll be rewarded, I am sure.