I know what you mean. When one of the outdoor cats died on the operating table while being spayed, I felt awful. I thought that perhaps I should've just let nature take its course, which is ridiculous, because that would've only compounded the problem. What this world does not need is more cats without homes and loving care. We can't save the world and we do have to trust that there are others out there who will give them the best care possible just as we do. But we punish ourselves when things don't turn out as we'd hoped. The Universe is watching, Kim. It's gonna be alright.
Blessings,
Mary
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Oh Kim I know you thru thick-n-thin would & will always make the fairest & right decisions.. I am here in any way to support you.. I will Pm you.. God Bless you & your family in the upmost of the New Year.. 
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