this is always hard to tell. i'm the oldest kid in my family, my first brother is 3 years younger then me. in his late teens, he got into drugs, then breaking and entering to get money for drugs. he stole from my mom (her mothers rings went so he could get more drugs), he stole from my neighbors, he tried to shake me down for drug money. he was a stupid criminal. he went to county jail time and again, mom kept posting his bail, he kept doing the same thing over and over, and it got worse, finally. he has been in the state prison system for the last 15 years. every christmas, mom cries. he's never coming out of prison, he never learned to take responsibility.
not everyone is like my brother, i know. it hurts me so much to see my mom cry every christmas, yet, if he had not been 'rescued' time and again, maybe it would have been different for him and her. be strong kim, it's not easy, but jenna comes first. (hugs)