I've been gone since this morning. Some friends and I went shopping in Orlando. We talked at her house for a while. I finally had to face the fact that it was time to go to the house. I have no home any more. It's just a cold, empty place without you. This pain is unbearable. We ate at the Cracker Barrell today and I bought a small angel beanie baby bear holding a star. It's going to hang in my car. I didn't even sleep in my bed last night. Right now, I wish I had a heart of stone, so I wouldn't feel the pain of your absence. I have a feeling your Christmas Hawaiin shirt will be there when I get to the house. You would have looked so cute in it. How I wish you didn't have to leave me.