Quote Originally Posted by popcornbird
This is the EXACT reason I so easily overlook my husband's mistakes. Because he overlooks mine. Because he never holds my faults against me. Because he just laughs, hugs me, and tells me 'Its okay', when I forget to do something I was supposed to. He asked me for a glass of water the other day, as I was heading for the kitchen, and on my way back, I forgot to get it for him. He remembered, but didn't even remind me as he didn't want me to feel bad. I sat with him, talked for like half an hour, before I suddenly remembered and asked him, "Oh my gosh...did I ever get some water for you?" He laughed and said, "Nope...you didn't. Finally you remember!"

Now, someone else may have thought, "What an uncaring wife...I'm thirsty, busy with my work...she's IN the kitchen, and she didn't get me any water." Its EASY to blame others, but the fact is, it is always the intention that counts. I forget. My husband forgets. Sometimes, we even forget to do things for each other. That doesn't mean we don't love each other or care for each other. It just means that he's human and I'm human, and we make mistakes.
PCB- I appreciate your example, however, that isn't exactly what seems to be going on in Loebedo's house. Of course no one would get 'mad' at you for forgetting a glass of water. And, it is super hard to imagine that someone would think you 'uncaring' over a glass of water. Those ARE silly things. Forgetting something isn't exactly the same thing as overlooking something significant to the other person. Mistakes imply a lack of intent. Loebedo's husband's treatment of Loebedo doesn't seem to be a 'mistake'. It seems intentional.

And, as to Sparks19, I did find your post a tiny bit offensive towards Loebedo. Did I comment on it before? Nope. I 'overlooked' it. I think Loebedo should feel free to vent to us, and I dislike how many of us seem to cruicify her for her feelings. It is like, somehow, that her husband's needs/wants/feelings come before hers.

I hope Loebedo, for Loebedo's sake only, takes anything she finds helpful from these posts, and makes her life a bit more comfortable for her. If she reads these posts and thinks, "Wow, what a load of rubbish", that that helps her to the next place in life.