Quote Originally Posted by Cataholic
I wonder, for those that are more of the 'it isn't a big deal', or 'men are different' position, how things fare when YOU forget to do those little things...cooking, cleaning, remember his family's events, pressies for your kids, laundry, etc. How does that go over? How about if YOU "forgot" to remind him for the 20th time to get outta bed, its worktime would go over well.

Curiously wondering. I guess my point is, if I have a point, is there equality with the overlooking of 'faults' issue? (Equality not having a pure 50/50 meaning, of course, but, an equitable meaning)
This is the EXACT reason I so easily overlook my husband's mistakes. Because he overlooks mine. Because he never holds my faults against me. Because he just laughs, hugs me, and tells me 'Its okay', when I forget to do something I was supposed to. He asked me for a glass of water the other day, as I was heading for the kitchen, and on my way back, I forgot to get it for him. He remembered, but didn't even remind me as he didn't want me to feel bad. I sat with him, talked for like half an hour, before I suddenly remembered and asked him, "Oh my gosh...did I ever get some water for you?" He laughed and said, "Nope...you didn't. Finally you remember!"

Now, someone else may have thought, "What an uncaring wife...I'm thirsty, busy with my work...she's IN the kitchen, and she didn't get me any water." Its EASY to blame others, but the fact is, it is always the intention that counts. I forget. My husband forgets. Sometimes, we even forget to do things for each other. That doesn't mean we don't love each other or care for each other. It just means that he's human and I'm human, and we make mistakes.

I would forgive and forget and compromise for the rest of my life, than to EVER be single again for a moment. Sure, when I'm 'single', I don't have someone to worry about, but the fact is...love is FAR more meaningful than material things, or gifts on 'certain' dates. I love my husband for the sake of who he is, not for what he remembers to buy me. Its the small pleasures in life that are the greatest treasures. Cherish them. I would never hold anger towards my husband. There are times when we do little things that our spouse may not like, but what we should always remember is the love that brought us together, and why we married. I haven't read all the posts here, but really...just like one would love their child unconditionally, the love for the spouse should be the same. After all, it is the love we have for our spouse that leads to having a child and starting a family. Everyone makes mistakes. I stick to my previous opinion. He's your husband. He tried his best. Forgive, forget, and move on.

One thing I must add though...Lobodeb, I do feel your husband needs to drive. He's the husband in the house, and if 'driving and getting things you need' is anyone's responsibility, it is his responsibility above yours, or he should at least help in it. That doesn't mean you should have war with him because of it...just that you should try to convince him. I don't know how easy your husband is to talk to or deal with, but I would never fight over things like this. God doesn't give us life and loved ones to take foregranted.