I always think of the "what if I would have sent him to you." He would have still been alive.
Sweetie...I know what you mean. Lobodeb would have been a wonderful meowmie to Payton, and he would have had a wonderful loved life! And maybe been spoiled JUST a bit!

But accidents are accidents - and they happen any time, unexpectedly. It could easily be Carla in your shoes right now.

It's natural to feel some guilt - "if only this, if only that"...Be gentle with yourself.

On a lighter note - have you ever done a 'kitten growing up' thread on Payton? And where did you get his name?

HUGS!