Would this upset you?

[Prairie Purrs]

Catsindenver, you bring up a good point. I didn't get that from the post so I didn't think about that. if he did in fact make an effort before why has he suddenly stopped. What I got from the post is that he has never really put out much of an effort on holidays.

however, I do disagree with you on one point.



I think how a SO treats every single DAY is an indication on where you stand with them. If they only put out the effort on special occassions then isn't the gesture a little.... empty? I would rather him forget about my birthday and make his feelings towards me abundantly clear the rest of the year Then have a big deal made of my birthday just so he has a bye for the rest of the year and doesn't have to show how he feels until next year.

Lobodeb's comment about what he'd done in the past appears in a later post, where she responds to some of the initial comments.

And of course it matters how your SO treats you day to day. But the topic seemed to be birthdays, so I was going with that.

[sparks19]

Lobodeb's comment about what he'd done in the past appears in a later post, where she responds to some of the initial comments.

And of course it matters how your SO treats you day to day. But the topic seemed to be birthdays, so I was going with that.

AH gotcha. I must have missed that post somehow. LOL this thread has been moving fast LOL

[timlewis]

I have to agree that its how they treat you day to day not just one or two days a year. If you are happy everyother day who cares about 2 or 3 days a year, a b-day is just another day and christmas well everyone thinks about what they are getting instead of what it really is. Everyone has forgot all about Jesus what about his b-day what did he get this year? If my wife got mad at me for not getting her something for her b-day then I might not get it just for the point because she shouldnt get mad. And personally I could care less what or if she gets me anything for mine or for christmas I am happy whatching her and my 2 kids opening their gifts. As long as they are happy who cares if i get anything i just like seeing my son and daughter and wife open gifts and seeing the smile on their face. Everyone is so caught up in material things we have forgotten about what matters LOVE do u love your husband or do you just want things? My wife cooks everyday and i could eat it off the floor my house is so clean (All The Time) and most important she takes great care of my kids. Not to mention all the small things she does and mentioned by someone before, i couldnt tell u the last time i had to get my soap out from under the sink if it start to melt away it suddenly just appears there and those little things is what matters the most. LOL not soap but little things that she does for me i couldnt live without her she makes my dinner for me everyday before i go to work, i use to take an apple and she would cut it up and put it in a little bowl for me, so why would i care if she remembers one or days a year. I tell u one more little story and ill shuttup, at sunday school they always ask if anyone has any b-days or anniversary and they sing to them. Well noone said anything and 2 or 3 days after we remembered that sunday was our anniversary and we hadnt bought anything for one another.

[Samantha Puppy]

There is nothing wrong in wanting your partner to be considerate of your feelings, likes, dislikes - of you, in general. If they love you, things that matter to you should matter to them. I too have a difficult time when I go out of my way to be sweet, thoughtful, or otherwise considerate of my husband and he doesn't reciprocate. Marriage is give and take, 50/50, and when it gets lop-sided too far in one direction, any human is going to get disillusioned and allow other issues to snowball into this one and get more upset than they would were it an isolated incident.

You're not being a diva. You're a woman.