Quote Originally Posted by lizbud
A line from sparks previous post stated "He ALWAYS does the laundry because he knows I hate doing the laundry" Thats exactly the kind of
"knowing" that I meant in regards to a "knowing " the other partners
feelings on remembering special days (birthdays, anniversery, etc)

The gift itself is nothing compared to the remembering how the other
person feels about it & making an effort to show they do care about their
feelings by remembering.

LOL he only KNOWS it because if he doesn't do it then he runs out of clean clothes LOL. he does it because he knows I won't do it. LOL it really has nothing to do with knowing my feelings on the subject. It just doesn't get done.... but he never complains about me not doing it.

Also he did send her flowers and left her a card. That is remembering. How was he to know that wasn't enough? I think that is remembering how the person feels and he did make an effort. What I got from the post was the it was not enough of an effort.

You know what I got and what we did for our first wedding anniversary? I got a wonderful card and some nice flowers. that night we went to my husbands hockey game.... the same thing we did on our wedding night. BUT, I love going to his games and all our friends are there. I don't need extravegant gifts or to go to fancy places, I am a down to earth kinda girl and spending the night at my hubby's hockey game and having a few beers in the parking lot after is just my kind of night.

My husband was married before, she EXPECTED many things from him. she took many things for granted with him. she expected him to do everything with her family, yet she never wanted to do anything with his family. Now they are divorced and we are happier than ever because we can just be ourselves, we can make mistakes, we can screw up, we can forget things but it's ok because we always know the love is there. he NEVER forgets to tell me how much he loves me.

Glacier, Great post. That is exactly how it is here... sorta. Except my husband works and I don't at the moment. He is a much better cook than I am but I enjoy cooking so we almost fight over who gets to cook dinner LOL, sometimes (if the room in the kitchen permits) we will make dinner together. He was in the Army though so he is much neater than I am. he folds his clothes just so, I just fold em so they at least look folded lol. But he is a big boy, he is an adult. if he wanted a mother he would have never left home. I find people confuse Wife with mother too often. We are not there to "take care of them". Believe it or not, most men can take care of themselves just fine (although there is nothing wrong with babying them every once in while, God knows my husband takes care of me when i am not 100%). I am his wife not his mother, he knows that. I made that abundantly clear before we even decided to get married. He is much neater than I am though lol so he usually has to pick up behind me hahahaha. poor guy