Great posts K9Soul, Sparks, and Richard. I couldn't agree more. VERY well said. People aren't perfect and it we nitpick the little stuff to death, then we lose sight of the important things. It's just not THAT big of a deal and he DID get flowers and DID get a card ON the day of your birthday. The first year we were married my husband forgot my birthday. It's on Christmas and he just forgot. Well here we are 17 years later. That nitpicky little crap will destroy a marriage if that's all that seems to matter. Worry about the big things. The rest of it IS trivial. Is it worth having angry hard feelings over a birhtday present, to hold onto that and have it cause marital problems over THAT??? Real love is not about whether or not someone gets you the right present on the right day. We don't do valentines, saying Happy Birthday is enough for us, it's the things you do for each other every day that matter. If there is a problem there, then that needs to be addressed on its own, not the issue of presents. People put waaay too much stock in that kind of thing nowdays. I bet people who lost spouses this year would be thrilled just to have a hug or an I love you from the person they lost. Try looking at the positives, not the negatives, there are always negatives in life. It's not settling for less, it's realizing people aren't perfect and we ALL have faults, some of us just learn how to deal with other's because we have faults of our own and realize that no matter who we are with, they will never be perfect and do things exactly as we would like, but if you can't accept other people's faults, why the heck should you expect them to accept yours?