hello fosteraussie - i bet the whole trouble is because amber is a girl! female cats are atrocious at accepting other cats - usually other females. she obviously gets on with your other cat - so she may get used to the new one. it's sometimes a very long drawn out business. separating them for sometime can often work too. you'll probably get lots of good advice later on. when our usa pettalkers are up and about! i'd say hang in there - he sounds a lovely furboy who deserves your love.
lynne