Opinions...please help...

[catnapper]

I don't envy the spot you're in.

This is what I'd do:
She dumps the laundry by the laundry room? You pick it up and dump it back in her room, with the explanation that she is to do her own laundry, one load at a time like the rest of the family. She dumps it back at the laundry room without even attempting ot wash it herself? Toss it onto the front porch. Works like a charm.

As for the tv at night? Hit the circuit breaker. No electricity = no tv.

You're going to feel like the Wicked Witch of the West but its something that has to be done in order to get through to her. Talking and rationalizing hasn't gotten you anywhere, as I'm sure neither has screaming and shouting. Now is time for action.

If you consistently let her know that you're here to help her through this tragedy, not be her servant, then she'll either get the hint and clean up her act or leave. Either way she'll learn an important life lesson. Staying will help her grow in a caring and nurturing environment and she'll finally learn that a family helps each other. Leaving will help her realize just how much responsibility she's ignored in life, and that life doesn't revolve around her.

[caseysmom]

Thanks Kim. Its just hard for me to relate, I was married at 22, had a job, paid my own bills and did all my own housework.

She sits and watches fox news, bad mouths democrats (she knows we are more democrat than republican) when she was a teen for fun she taped rush limbaugh and listened to him.

I don't want her here. When my brother died she told the coroner I will go live with her and pointed at me, she never asked me and I never asked her. The coroner was ready to put her in adult protective custody because the house was so disgusting and the coroner said she didn't think she could be on her own.

I don't know what else to do with her, her mom's side of the family has stayer clear away and my sister doesn't want any part in it, she has always thought they were really rude.