Mrs. Sara and Ms. Johanna...you are too funny!
There's a small difference in what to call elders in my culture though. As a child, I was taught to call my mom's friends 'Auntie' and my dad's friends 'Uncle'. I guess these words are used because it just makes the relationship feel closer. I always called my teachers 'Mrs. (last name).' For me, being an adult doesn't give the priveledge to call people by their names...because as a child, I called people close to my age, or even 10 years older by their names. Its the same now. Its more a 'big age difference thing'. People in my age group, or people who are my friends, even if they are older, are called by their names...but my mom's close friends who are in their 40s/50s, and have known me since I was a baby are still 'aunties' to me, and will always be. If I were to meet a new person in their 40s/50s, I'd probably call them by their names, but in a close long-term family friend relationship, the 'respect word' is still there. I couldn't ever bring myself to call a 70 or 80 year old grandma by her name. That is just not very respectful, in my eyes. Until now, I have been fine with children calling me by my name, but once I become a mother, I know I would dislike the children of my friends, or the friends of my children calling me by my name. I wouldn't like being called Mrs. either. He he he.
My husband is like you, Karen. He has grown SO close to my parents over the past few months, but he still can't bring himself to call them anything. He greets them lovingly, sits and chats with them, but somehow, manages to avoid addressing them with a 'name'. My mom sometimes lovingly calls him "My son", and at that time, he responds by calling her 'his mom', but generally speaking, he has not yet started to call them anything. He gave them a gift and card a few months ago, and in the card, wrote, "To my dear mother-in-law and father-in-law". I guess this relationship is just hard to figure out! LOL!
To me, my MOM is the one who gave birth to me, and raised me. No one else. My DAD is the one who is my father, raised me, the one that I grew up with. No one else. Of course I do feel I should have a close relationship with my in-laws. They are the parents of the person I love the most in this world, so they should be close. Like my husband, I find myself confused on what to call them. I want an informal, yet respectful relationship with them. Mr. and Mrs. sounds too formal to me. Mom and Dad seems too strange to me. Aunt and Uncle doesn't fit into this relationship. They are my husband's parents...not my parents' friends. I'm just SO confused. I asked my husband what I should call them, and he laughed and told me that perhaps when he finally comes up with something to call MY parents, he could tell me. I wonder if I will end up like Karen...greeting them without calling them anything. Then...I wonder how we will ever develop a bond. He he he. Calling a relative something makes the relationship feel so much closer. I could ask them after developing a bit of a bond, but right now, I haven't even met them in person yet, so I don't know how to ask them. I guess we'll wait and see. My sister-in-law (husband's brother's wife) calls them 'Mom and Dad', but for me, calling someone ELSE Mom or Dad just doesn't feel right. Maybe things will change later on as we grow closer, but they are new to me right now, so it will take awhile to feel comfortable enough to call them something THAT close.
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