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Thread: Inlaws mean dog

  1. #1

    Angry Inlaws mean dog

    Hello:

    I'm new to this forum and I really need some advice. My in-laws moved in with us last year. I love them dearly, but they have a rather mean-spirited dog. He is a Bijon, approximately 10 years old. He is rather large for the breed, and very much overweight (He has no shut-off valve – one time he got into a bag of dog food and literally ate his way to the bottom) , and spoiled rotten. He steals food at every opportunity, and has a very loud obnoxious bark which drives me up the wall. However, the main problem is that he growls and snaps at you sometimes when you try to move him. Now mind you, none of us have ever been mean or mistreated him.

    Last evening was perhaps the last straw for me. He got under the foot rest of our recliner. My nephew who is visiting, lowered the foot rest, not knowing the dog was under it, and hit the dog on the head, and he yelped. This is not the first time this has happened. Once again, the dog refused to budge, when I prompted him (At first it was, gentle, then when he still did not move, I was more firm, but I did not yell at him). And once again, as I approached him, he began to growl. I reached under the foot rest to try to physically move him, when he bit me.

    I have tried to interest my other family members in some sort of behavior training, I've even given them tips by the famous Dog Whisperer, but they have taken very little interest in actively modifying his behavior.

    After I was bitten last evening, I told my in-laws that this was intolerable. At first, they made excuses for the dog, but then asked me what I wanted to do. I was too angry to respond, and my finger was swollen, so I decided to wait until today to deal with it. After much consideration, I've come up with some alternatives: 1) Place a muzzle on the dog when he is in our presence, 2) cage him, 3) Keep him in another location. Does anyone here have any further suggestions?


    In advance, thanks so much for your help!
    Last edited by larbabe; 06-14-2006 at 05:17 PM.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Aug 2002
    Location
    Upstate NY
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    8,040
    Welcome to PT!
    If they are not willing to seek behavioral help or even listen to suggestions I would say that the choices you listed are about the only choices you have.

    Good luck and hope your hand heals fine.
    Soar high & free my sweet fur angels. I love you Nanook & Raustyk... forever & ever.


  3. #3

    I forgot to mention

    We have two other dogs. The first is a very mild-mannered American Jindo named Missy who normally would not hurt a fly. We recently were given an 8 month-old Yorkshire terrier puppy, and Missy has taken to the puppy like it is her baby. On several occasions, the puppy has irritated my in-laws' dog who, in turn, snapped at the puppy. Since then Missy has been snapping at the bijon. This was the first excuse my in-laws used for his behavior. I told them that this behavior has been on-going long before Missy started snapping at him, and that the dynamics between the animals has no bearing on this dog's behavior toward humans. Regardless, thanks for your input!
    Last edited by larbabe; 06-14-2006 at 05:21 PM.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Location
    Illinois
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    9,637
    I'm sorry that this is happening. I know that Bichon Frise are never supposed to show any kind of agression. Perhaps something else could be bothering him? Could it be physical? Also I know that there might be some little behaviour thing of yours or of another family member that could be causing him to do this. It is very hard to tell without seeing it. Is there any way you could upload a video so we can see? Sometimes it is the littlelest thing that is setting the dog off.

    Niño & Eliza



  5. #5

    I think I misquoted Bichon "Frise"

    I removed the Frise. I think he is a Bijon Bijay (spelling?). I agree that this is not the normal behavior of the breed. My inlaws had another Bijon who recently passed away, and which was a wonderful dog. I don't have a video of him, but I believe I've listed the circumstances and behavior appropriately. The dog was given to my inlaws approximately five years ago by their son. Although I have no evidence of this, it is possible that the dog might have been mistreated by his ex-wife. My inlaws are elderly and I know for a fact they have not mistreated the dog (nor have my wife or I), but they also have not been firm or consistent with him either. Believe me, the dog has always been in charge. It has growled and snapped at them when they have also tried to move him, but they have not attempted to deal with the behavior. I believe the biting could have happened to any one of us; I just happened to be the first.

  6. #6
    Join Date
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    Oh I know you're not mistreating him but I just meant little things you don't even notice you are doing. I'm not sure I know the breed, what does he look like? I'm sorry I can't help you, I don't know much about dog behaviour, only what I learned from my own dog.

    Niño & Eliza



  7. #7

    I have a picture of him

    But I don't know quite how to post it here. I can try to email it directly to you.

  8. #8
    is there any way you could ask them if you could take him to an obedience class or have they already said no? if you don't feel comfortable handling him I understand.

  9. #9

    Unfortunately

    They are very defensive about the dog. In addition, I am not around him nearly as much as the other members of the family. I work full time and the drive to work is one hour each way, which leaves mostly weekends. As I understand it, dog obedience does not work unless all family members are consistent in the behavior corrections. The final factor is, you are right, I do not care for the dog, especially after last evening.

  10. #10
    hm i suppose you really don't have much else other than what you mentioned then sorry I cannot be of better help.

  11. #11

    Angry The seriousness of the bite

    I guess I didn't express how serious this is. Other than my finger swelling up, my major concern is what will happen when my grandchildren come to visit, and one of them happens to approach this dog in one of his unapproachable positions? Believe me, the dog is spoiled rotten, and as far as I can see, no one has really bothered to deal sternly with his behavior.
    Last edited by larbabe; 06-14-2006 at 05:23 PM.

  12. #12
    Join Date
    Oct 2004
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    Northern California
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    3,182
    It is called a Bichon Frise :


    What kind of training has this dog received, if any at all?

    Can you give us an idea of his kennel situation? When he receives his dinner, is he asked to perform any tasks first?

    What kind of exercise does he receive, if any at all?

    You know, negligence is a form of abuse and while your in-laws mean well, it sounds like they're indirectly abusing the poor Bichon. All dogs are born with the potential to be well-mannered family dogs, but it is up to the humans to shape them into such canines. If your in-laws can't manage this simple task of training their dog efficiently, report the bite and get the animal control involved. My heart goes out to you AND the bichon because it sounds like neither sides are happy right now, and I would HATE to see the bichon living a life where he is not wanted or loved by all of the family. Bichons are incredibly happy, gregarious dogs who *adore* their family.

    Happy, trained dogs do not bite, and it sounds like your in-law's bichon is in desperate need of NILIF, obedience training, and some *positive* attention.

    Muzzling him, caging him, and confining him will only make matters worse as he gains not only space aggression, but resource aggression as well.

    Lastly, never physically force a dog to move him/herself. This is the best way to get yourself bitten. I know you had no choice, but a dog has two choices: fight or flight. When you take away one option (flight), he will fight. A trapped dog is an agitated dog who's ready and willing to bite. Instead of physical force, let him calm down and entice him out with a yummy treat and lots of praise. If you call him out to punish him, he will not come out again.

    Tell your in-laws that these are their two options:
    1) Get the dog obedience and NILIF (Nothing In Life Is Free: http://k9deb.com/nilif.htm) trained (offer to help them) OR
    2) You report the bite and get the animal control involved and make it clear that you do not want a dog capable of dangerous biting living with your family and young children.

  13. #13
    Join Date
    Jun 2000
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    Windham, Vermont, USA
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    40,851
    Tell them he needs to be on a leash at all times if they are not willing to retrain him. This will not only help in moving him when you need to, but that way, if your grandchildren are visting, or other visitors are there, one of them can keep the dog near them and controlled via the leash the whole time so these incidents do not a=occur.

  14. #14
    [QUOTE=Giselle]It is called a Bichon Frise :


    What kind of training has this dog received, if any at all?
    None that I'm aware of.

    Can you give us an idea of his kennel situation? When he receives his dinner, is he asked to perform any tasks first?
    No tasks are given, he just eats...and wants more.

    What kind of exercise does he receive, if any at all?
    He does go on long walks quite often, so I know he gets plenty of excercise.

    If you call him out to punish him, he will not come out again.
    I have never punished him or spoken harshly to him, even after he bit me.

    Thanks so much for your information. It has given me several directions in which to go.

  15. #15
    Join Date
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    I hail from South Carolina, but Texas is where I hang my hat :)
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    At his age, he may be losing his sight or hearing or something or could just be getting uncomfortable physically. Many dogs will snap or growl when they're unsure of their surroundings or what's happening. A visit to the vet may be in order to make sure there's nothing physically or internally wrong with him. Older dogs can show signs of irritation more quickly and with more venom than younger dogs. I think you just need to be firm with your in-laws about the seriousness of the situation. Regardless of why the dog is ill-tempered or easily agitated, he's bitten people, and, needs to be treated slightly differently than in the past. What does your spouse (their child) think of the situation? Is he/she on your side, because I think that's important. Anyway, I don't know very much about Bichons, so, I can't really be of much help with specifics of the breed.
    The idea that some lives matter less is the root of all that is wrong with the world. - Dr. Paul Farmer

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