Should there be an age limit

[Lori Jordan]

At 13 who is mature? i know my daughter is far from mature!It ws just the way people explained on how the suicide was commitd that i have a problem with!

[Lady's Human]

so you all can gang up on someone else from now on

I didn't realise we were "Ganging up" on anyone. Merely dissenting opinions. Ganging up would imply it was organized, which it most certainly wasn't.

[Catty1]

Lori Jordan - WHAT did you go through with your own mother? Whatever it was, you certainly want to protect your daughter from it. Swinging the pendulum all the other way doesn't always do the job, since it is done out of fear(most times, not necessarily in your case).

I'm not saying this is you - but people who grow up in alcoholic or dysfunctional homes share some common characteristics. And these get passed on to the kids, because that's all they know.

Here they are, just FYI:

Many of us found that we had several characteristics in common as a result of being brought up in an alcoholic or other dysfunctional households.
We had come to feel isolated, and uneasy with other people, especially authority figures. To protect ourselves, we became people pleasers, even though we lost our own identities in the process. All the same we would mistake any personal criticism as a threat.
We either became alcoholics ourselves, married them, or both. Failing that, we found other compulsive personalities, such as a workaholic, to fulfill our sick need for abandonment.
We lived live from the standpoint of victims. Having an over developed sense of responsibility, we preferred to be concerned with others rather than ourselves. We got guilt feelings when we trusted ourselves, giving in to others. We became reactors rather than actors, letting others take the initiative.
We were dependent personalities, terrified of abandonment, willing to do almost anything to hold on to a relationship in order not to be abandoned emotionally. We keep choosing insecure relationships because they matched our childhood relationship with alcoholic or dysfunctional parents.
These symptoms of the family disease of alcoholism or other dysfunction made us 'co-victims', those who take on the characteristics of the disease without necessarily ever taking a drink. We learned to keep our feelings down as children and keep them buried as adults. As a result of this conditioning, we often confused love with pity, tending to love those we could rescue.
Even more self-defeating, we became addicted to excitement in all our affairs, preferring constant upset to workable solutions.
This is a description, not an indictment
************************************************** ***

Do you ever hear from your daughter what kids talk about at school? Or from the teachers? Just because you don't hear about it doesn't mean it isn't there. I'll bet, like Karen, that your daughter has heard more than you think. It's all a matter of where you want her to learn about life's realities.

hugs
Catty1