I think I need to rehome Monte

[Lizzie]

I admire you for facing up to this dilema and being prepared to make tough decisions. My Artful Dodger was a constant stalker and pouncer, he even jumped on my elderly Ginger the day before he died of multiple disorders, he just couldn't stop the behavior. I tried medication, isolation, temporary rejection for bad behavior, lots of things. The problem for me was that the cats he picked on were all "very difficult to place" kind of cats, so finding homes any one of them would have been miraculous. And I had a very close bond with Dodger as he did with me. Also, I'd seen far too many bad and indifferent homes for cats to consider trying to re-home him. So, we all lived with it and it was often miserable.

Now I have another one, but she's a perpetual motion kind of cat that pounces because she wants to rough-house with any cat she sees. She needs to be with other cats and the two males she lives with have learned to deal with her. Taranis, on the other hand, hates her and I do have peeing in wrong places problems with her.

I look at carers of many cats such as Gina and Gary and shake my head in wonder. How do they manage to have such relatively calm households?

Good luck with your search for a new and good home for Monte and Gus.

[Cataholic]

K- Tex went to the bridge a year ago this May. And, while Monte was a bit of a terror even then, several things stand out. Tex, and only Tex, was the alpha cat- even as sick as he was at the end. Tex kept Monte in his place, and Geo under his paw. Tex and Geo were truly best friends. So,when Tex made the trip two things happened. Monte became a self proclaimed 'king', AND, Geo lost her protector. Monte was very young a year ago, he was relatively knew to my household (6 months), and was just a year old. Monte has matured.

I have scolded the heck out of Monte, and have pinned him to the floor twice, scaring him, when I caught him going at Georgie. Monte will exit my room when I snap my fingers at him- he knows he shouldn't be in there, and is apprehensive (but, not fearful) of my presence when he is in there. He will scoot away from me ONLY when I come into contact with him in this room. So, I know he 'knows' on some level what is going on.

One night, I tried to lock Monte in the basement. Yeah, right. If Monte wasn't howling up a storm to get upstairs, then, Gus was beating down the door to get downstairs with Monte. So, I put them BOTH down there. They both fought to get UPstairs! This was all at 230am. You know how hard it is to scream silently at cats to stop it,when Jonah is sleeping ten feet away from the ruckus? I was sweating profusely, as awake as could be, and fuming mad. At that moment, I wanted NO cats in my house.

I have thought of the big cage idea. I could set it up in my bedroom, or the living room, I suppose, and confine Monte when he 'acts' up. Does anyone have any personal experience with this? Would it really work?

The peeing on the couch is so distressing to me. It was new, and, it now stinks. But, what can I do? I know it isn't their preference to pee there...

[Felicia's Mom]

I want to wish you good luck in whatever you do

[jenluckenbach]

I think I totally understand the type of cat Monte is. None of my personal cats do this, but my beloved foster cat Pumpkin was just like that. He was a bully! And he ENJOYED being a bully!

I tried medication for him, and the vet is right, it did not stop the stalking.

Choosing to rehome Monte (or Monte and Gus) might make everyone involved happy. Georgia will have relief, you will have peace and Monte can live somewhere that his personality shines!! (and doesn't get him into trouble). I will be hard, very hard, and I wish I could offer a better solution.

I am so sorry. I can't even fathom the pain of giving up one of your own.

[popcornbird]

Johanna, I am so sorry you are going through this. Wish you the best. I know you will make the best decision possible. {{{hugs}}}

[Lizzie]

Thinking about this more, and remembering what it was like in my household, I wanted to add a few more thoughts. My experience is the same as Jen's, the medication made Dodger drowsy but didn't stop the stalking and pouncing. It was what he lived for, he couldn't resist no matter how much he knew I hate it. And, as I said, we were intensely closely bonded. I cried rivers over medicating him so that he became sluggish, pushing him away when he misbehaved, isolating him for hours or weeks, making him an outdoor/indoor cat, nothing ever worked.

Does he stalk and pounce when the cats try to use the litter boxes? That's what Dodger did and it led to all kinds of problems. Most of the cats would just dash in and out, knowing he was waiting to jump on them the moment they left their box. Two of them ended up living in a closet in the hall, the closest they could get to the litter room without living in it. When I tried to ease them into the living room, providing them with hiding places, one of them peed and pooped under covered tables. Your cat may use the couch not just to object to her current living conditions but also because she considers it her only "safe" litter area.

I don't think you can re-train a cat not to stalk and pounce. You can train cats that they can't do certain things in certain places, such as not jumping on counters or they are not welcome in a certain room, that's territory and makes sense to them. I don't think stopping a behavior towards other cats does make sense to them.

[sasvermont]

Remember when Tiberus, the Bengal cat was stalking and biting Miley? He was re-homed and it has worked out perfectly. I had contacted a cat behaviorist, and made an appointment, but rehomed Ti Ti before the appointment. I could have waited I suppose, but once I thought I found the right home, I went with it.

I really think Miley is my/the problem in my house, because now Juni is picking on Miley....the weak one and that Ti Ti and Juni have/had tuned in on her fear and went for her....its natural for cats to do that.....

I would rehome the aggressive one.....and if his buddy would be happy going with him, all the better.

Cats can adjust. Ti Ti is sooooo happy where he is. He has a little Bengal brother and two dogs..... and Ti Ti is still king, just no one there to "pick on"....cause no one takes any crap from him.

I was going to give Miley a gun to carry around while Ti lived with us, but she refused to use it.

Rehoming, if done carefully, works out for everyone eventually.

Sorry to hear you have such confusion in your household.

[Cataholic]

Thanks everyone.

I just cannot come to grips with rehoming Monte (or Monte and Gus) as I love them so much. I love Georgia, and, she is my link to Tex, too. I think I might look into a behaviorist, though, I do agree with Lizzie...I am not sure you can change Monte. And, like Lizzie, I feel like Monte KNOWS how much I hate what he does, but, he still does it.

I will keep you updated.