Angie - I am sorry, it must be a tremendous shock and it probably seems unreal to you now. I hope the grandmother and daughter can find comfort in each other.

This very nearly happened to me. I was seconds away from dying when I woke up very suddenly (most unlike me). I turned my head very slowly, some instinct told me to do this, to see my husband standing beside the bed with his gun in his hand. I just looked at him, silently, calmly. He broke down and begged me to help him. Months later, after seeing a psychiatrist, he admitted that he'd planned the murder suicide for several months. Even now, over 20 years later, it all seems so unreal. I knew he was depressed and had been encouraging him to seek help to no avail. Often, the people closest to those who are in such trouble are the ones least able to help.

There are many, many reasons why this came so close to happening, though the central reasons were not hatred or revenge. When people reach this type of decision, their reasoning is so cut off from reality that stopping it from happening is nearly impossible. It's incredible how planned out it is and no-one realizes what is going on in their mind. I loathe it when they involve children also, but they are, apparently, trying to protect them.

I'm not a religious or philosophical or sentimental type of person. I don't believe in angels or miracles. But, I must admit that when I look back on that day (which is rare), I always wonder if my mother, who died when I was a toddler, somehow guided me in waking up when I did, and responding as I did.