I was trying not to mention Nigella ...

Where did you find that link?????!!!! Toilet tissue??? What on earth is that? Please allow me to assure you that nothing from the toilet is allowed on my dinner table!!

To continue ... Christmas crackers are a tradition here, on the table on Christmas Day. Everyone gets one, and they contain a small gift, a paper hat (which all the oldies like to wear), and one of the worst jokes of all time.