joke thread

[todd]

great Ida

[AmberLee]

Five surgeons are discussing who makes the best patients to operate on.

The first surgeon says, "I like to see accountants on my operating table, because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered."

The second responds, "Yeah, but you should try electricians! Everything inside them is color coded."

The third surgeon says, "No, I really think librarians are the best; everything inside them is in alphabetical order."

The fourth surgeon chimes in: "You know, I like construction workers...those guys always understand when you have a few parts left over at the end, and when the job takes longer than you said it would."

But the fifth surgeon shut them all up when he observed: "You're all wrong. Politicians are the easiest to operate on. There's no guts, no heart, and no spine, and the head and butt are interchangeable."

[poofy]

I like the joke thread, lol..lol..have to find a couple of my favorites..

[AmberLee]

Top Ten Signs Your Cat Is Too Fat
Courtesy of The Late Show With David Letterman

10. Gets winded purring

9. Instead of trying to run from dogs, sits on them

8. The Maury people call every darn hour

7. Ears perk up whenever you mention Wendy's Free Fixin's Bar

6. He used 8 lives on heart attacks

5. Cat carrier is a Ford Escort

4. Richard Simmons' cat staged intervention

3. Can only wear cute sweaters from the Big and Tall Kitty Shop

2. Litter box so huge, it has nude bathing section

1. Instead of "meow" he says, "mayo"

[vinjashira]

A bear, a lion and a chicken meet.

Bear says: "If I roar in the forests of North America, the entire forest
shivers with fear."

Lion says: "And if I roar on the great plains of Africa, the entire
savannah is afraid of me."

Says the chicken: "Big deal. I only have to cough, and the entire planet
panics."