My whole life is falling apart

[tatsxxx11]

Wonderfully, perfectly said gini, I couldn't agree with you more. And our dear, sweet Sara, always the one to take it all on the chin and suffer silently I can only imagine how devastating it was for you to hear this news, to hear it now and in the manner that you did. As gini suggests, it is so important that you let your Mom, your Dad and your step mom know how all of this has impacted you, without placing blame or inditing; not in anger, but from your heart. Yes, use the "I" word! They all need to realize the overwhelming consequences of their actions or inactions. None of us lives or acts in a vacuum and what we do and say in life has far reaching effects. You are a brave and loving soul and I have no doubt that in time, you will reach a point of accepatance and hopefully, take from an otherwise sad and tragic circumstance, something positive. Again, as gini pointed out, the feelings you are experiencing are not dissimilar to those people who have experienced the death of a love one feel....shock, denial, anger, grief, acceptance. With the help of those who love you, and that certainly includes us, you will get through this Sara. Hold onto us, your friends, those who care for you and the thought that soon your life will be blessed with the greatest of gifts You cannot change what has happened, but you can look forward to the future with hope and optimism.

Love~

[pnance]

Sara I've read this thread and wasn't going to post because it brought a lot of memories for me back. But I thought some of this might help since I understand some of what your going through. When my parents seperated my dad also told me I wasn't his, at the same time my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer so I chose not to confront her with it. He then went and told my 8 year old sister that my mom was going to die when Dr.'s said w/treatment she had a good chance. All this was in the space of a month. Part of me has always regretted not confronting my mom about what he said, but to be honest I'm not sure I want to know. You should give yourself a lot of credit for doing that and agree with the others that you should sit down and talk to her or you'll probably always wonder. What gini said is right you have something wonderful to focus on right now and that's your child. Right now everything seems to be falling apart, but in the end you'll come out of all this a better/stronger person. Time can heal a lot of wounds and bring understanding. My father and I didn't speak for 10 years after all this and I lost all contact with that side of my family. In the past few years we've begun to take tentative steps towards a relationship. I guess the point i'm trying to make is that right now you probably feel that everything is going wrong, try to focus on the things that are good and going right and eventually you'll be able to look back on this time and realize it was hard and painful but gave you a stength and understanding that you'll pass on to your own child. I wish you all the best and if you just want to talk feel free to contact me.