Need Advice -- Please!!

[Queen of Poop]

Perhaps tell her that that name has already been used in your family and has great sentimental meaning to you and that you'd like her to be called something else that will end up being equally as significant to your children as Mom-Mom is to you. Good luck.

[prechrswife]

We've been going through similar issues around here--mostly my mom not knowing what she wants to be called. My husband's mom is already "Grandmama," and my grandmother is "Nanny." We have finally settled on "LaoLao" for my mom (Chinese for maternal grandmother).

On the same name issue, my husband calls my grandmother by her first name because his late grandmother was also "Nanny," and he isn't comfortable using this name for someone else.

As for my grandmothers, in addition to "Nanny" (which started out as "Granny," but that's another story for another day), my paternal grandmother was "Mamaw." (Can you tell I'm in the deep south? )

Edited to add: My father-in-law is "Granddaddy" and my dad will be "Papa."

[gemini9961]

I called my Mom's parents, Oma and Opa (German) and my Dad's parents were Grandma and Pappy. It looks like everyone has a unique way of identifying their grandparents. Can't MIL think of something unique for herself?

[Husky_mom]

actually we called the grandma(1), and grandpas (2) and to make a difference
it was "Tata" and "Yeyo".

i think you should only call her that IF you feel comfortable with it, if not, call her what you want, you can´t be imposed to doing it a certain way, if i were "forced" to call my MIL mom i wouldn´t no way jose!!, so i think is the same but with different people. but do as you feel better

[Samantha Puppy]

I don't know where she came up with Mom-Mom. Josh and his brothers called her mother Grandmom. They never knew their paternal grandmother (she died in 1963), so I don't know that they ever called her anything. I don't know if maybe Cindy called one of her grandmothers Mom-Mom and has fond memories of it at all. I'm really passive when it comes to confrontation, so I never asked whenever she'd mention being this baby's "Mom-Mom".

As for her ethnicity - nothing of note. I mean, her family's been over here forever and she has no Meditteranean heritage like Greek or Italian. She's just your average, jumbled-up Caucasian American woman.

Here is a picture of Cindy, me and Josh at my brother's wedding reception in October.


I guess I haven't talked to her about it because she and I are both pretty strong, stubborn women. I feel like all we ever do is clash about big things like this. We don't clash in a nasty way (most of the time), but the fact that nothing ever seems to be easy between us bugs me. I don't want to make an issue out of this... I just cannot seem to help it. I thought I'd just swallow it and be okay, but when I was addressing the envelopes and got to hers, I just froze. It was then I realized exactly how big a deal this is... and I just don't want it to turn into WWIII. What if she loves that name for a reason and she's always seen herself as being someone's Mom-Mom? I'm not saying she wouldn't understand... I'm just saying, I really don't feel like having to have "a talk" about this. Especially when we're currently in the middle of arguing about Christmas dinner!!! *sigh*

And prechrswife, I have a Mamaw too. She's my dad's step-mother and she rocks, but I don't get to see her often as she lives in Ohio. She's my last remaining grandmother.

[Lobodeb]

Where did she get the term Mom-Mom? Is it something that Josh's family has been using, or is it something she picked up from hearing you talk about your Mom-Mom?

I, too, have never heard that term before. My instict tells me to let her be called that (if it was already in their family) because she might be as influential to lil' Nug as your Mom-Mom was to you. If she got it from you, I'd suggest explaining to her why you aren't comfortable with calling her that.

Does that help? I swear, Libras (I'm a true Libra) can never make up our minds.