Once Upon A Time
... a long, long, long time ago (so they say) the many members of the Cat-ly Knights of the Pet Talk Round Table had an undersea adventure!
Now keep in mind that undersea adventures are VERY frustrating for felines! It's tricky getting into wet-suits when you have claws and no opposable thumbs, and it's awkward to have water pressing your wet-suit in all around your svelte, trim **ahem, cough, cough** body, AND it's miserable seeing a tasty, toothsome morsel slip by when your paws are in the blamed wet-suit and your head is incased in a bubble. It takes a lot to make cats go cavorting under the seas, you understand. It takes a lot, but our cats are valiant, brave, and daring! So, when the emergency call went out that small, valiant volunteers were needed to save the world, who answered the call? The brave, the furry, the valiant Knights of Pet Talk Round Table!
Background: Eco-terrorists have submerged pellets containing a virulent poison off of the Great Barrier Reef that will dissolve and eventually kill all life in the oceans - thereby killing all life in the world! **Gasp!! How dastardly!! How evil!!** By clever cunning they made the pellets ping-pong ball sized and hid them amid razor-sharp reef to keep humans at bay. For once all the humans were working together as a team, but they were stymied by their large size and (face it) awkward bodies.
Spenser-the-Lion called the KoPTRT together. As distasteful as it would be, they and they alone could save the world from certain death. Who else had the grace, artistry, and daring to wacky little ping-pong balls from impossible locations and out to where the humans could access them? Face it, when you think grace, you think kitty-cats, now don't you? From around the world each cat eagerly appeared and helped one another suit up. Ernie and Butter did spend a great deal of time racing around the beach kicking sand up and tackling one another, but it was pointed out that their energy was needed elsewhere. Casper and Kitty prettily lead the dive team off of the boat once it anchored above the fatal pellets. "Tha-awkie" the first pellet popped from under the reef! Mr. B. bopped it to the next cat in line, Cassy, who relayed it to Scooter, to Sydney, to Marius, to Smokey, to Princess, to Miss Vicki, to Shiloh and on and on it rolled until the human could capture and neutralize it. The same story repeated all over the reef: to the north: Stormy to Oliver to Livvy to Edwina to Ritzy to Snow Tiger to Amy to Tubby and to the East: Rainbow to Foxy to Noah to Kitty to Noel to Casper to Prema to Maya to Boots and to the South: Pesto to Garbo to Trevor to Mimi to Wynki to Simba to Jumper to Emmett to Pepper and to Stump … In fact, in all directions of the compass the many brave-hearted Knights thwackied ping-pong balls of destruction because they were so brave!
One human reported to his commander what he was seeing and was severely reprimanded for drinking while on duty. "There can't be hundreds of little cats in wet suits scampering at the bottom of the sea, you fool," he screamed, "Do you have rapture of the deep that you're seeing things?"
To be continued...
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